Language is a skin: I rub my language against the other. It is as if I had words instead of fingers, or fingers at the tip of my words. My language trembles with desire. - Roland Barthes

Latest Entry

Matches

April 10, 2024
Everyone else’s words make more sense than my own… a soft regurgitation. Parts of me are on fire and the world is burning to ash. the warmth is so, so good. Cracking out of this old shell. It hurts. It’s fucking painful to outgrow yourself, others. I'm trying so desperately to cling to the season...
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Recent Entries

  • Almost Made Up
    March 21, 2024
    Almost “…I loved you/like a man loves a woman he never touches, only writes to, keeps little photographs of. I would have loved you more if I sat in a small room rolling a cigarette and listened to you piss in the bathroom, but that didn’t happen….” – Bukowski, An Almost Made Up Poem
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  • This Close
    March 19, 2024
    What the hell is happening to me. since when was I this full of stars. Laux says ”Crazy woman, her brain full of bees…” It’s been years since I read those words and yet today I remembered and I understand. ____________ The question is not the what or the when but the how…. ———————                ...
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  • Broken Rules
    March 12, 2024
    Breaking broken rules I snap outdated logs of history in half shatter their bones make them shake at their core, like me. _______________ I don’t know when I started calling everyone love. Like they are all my little birds, my darlings to put in my pocket. Sometimes I love this chaotic spinning b...
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  • Shadow Work
    October 9, 2023
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  • Dear Little Me
    November 21, 2022
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  • Poor Ideas
    August 28, 2022
    I want to write like I’ve never known you, but today I couldn’t. And it pissed me off. so I cried instead. Aging brings forth so many new emotions for me. So many ideas and revelations. some of them are terrible ideas. some of them were terrible ideas still seen through to completion, because I&h...
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  • Solidarity / Being Out
    November 2, 2020
    Mania. Mania. Up down All around Depression Crash and Burn it all down Again. And again. Rinse and repeat. What year is it? ———— My almost 18 year old daughter came out several weeks back and all she asked of me was to please spread the word to the family and not to buy her…
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  • A long morning haiku
    June 29, 2020
    The inmates are riot- ing. We are out of apples. just call me snack bitch. *-V.
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  • the Chariot in love
    June 21, 2020
    . you are not a war. there is nothing to be won here. you asked me once what my ruin is. what could make me a monster. I didn’t answer. the answer is,   fear. I am that ordinary. I was born like this. but I have invented new ways to pray. the clock is…
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