Recent Entries

• Broken, Lost & Defeated…

  September 30, 2024

  Another broken home, Another failed relationship, I don't know what Ive done wrong to deserve this, Or even why things changed. Was he always this person? If he was, how could he have kept up his facade for so long? almost 6 years abuse free, the last 9 months have been living back in hell.…

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• Husband is in icu

  September 26, 2024

  I just done a whole pour my heart out entry on this, and I can't mentally do it again. My husband had a seizure yesterday and is in the ICU since last night, my kids a trashing my house I spent the day cleaning to keep me occupied, and I am struggling to keep my…

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• I almost Made it 3 Whole Weeks

  September 19, 2024

  almost 3 weeks since my last anxiety attack, and it was a doozy. The last few days has seen me listening to Meditation constantly again, finding ways to ground myself, and releasing energetic build ups by crying when I feel the need. Wednesday I had an attack in front of my 9 year old while…

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• 1st anxiety attack this past week

  September 7, 2024

  I find myself waiting for these anxiety attacks to come on when I know I shouldn't. I am finding that when I think I have finally gotten a handle of things and am doing well long enough to forget I have been having them, that is when they creep up on me and hit me…

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• Trying to find things to occupy my mind.

  September 6, 2024

  I had a major break down a whole 7 days ago today, this time last Friday I was literally begging and crying for the hospital to admit me to mental health and help me. (its 10:15pm here now). in the end the mental health nurse gave me a valium in an envelope told me I…

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• The Shitty Ones

  September 2, 2024

  Not everyone out there has good intentions Some people are just shit But those that twist and change your stories are deep in the shitty ones. I need to find new friends. not fully grown women who are worse than kids. surely someone out there will be in my corner  

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• Yesterday Was Good Today Was A Struggle

  August 27, 2024

  Yesterday I woke up feeling fantastic, no aches, no pains, no vertigo and no anxiety. Wish I could say the same about today though. Today has been a struggle with all of the above, plus I had the added bonus of having some stomach cramps, vomiting and nausea which I hyper fixated on and struggle&...

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• Is This What I Am Here For?

  August 24, 2024

  The past week has been a heck of emotions and anxious feelings, but today has been good. My oldest daughters 16 yr old friend is in foster care and has been running away from her carer, she's been skipping her cocktail of medications. After running away multiple times last night and self harming ...

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• Roller coaster Ride

  August 22, 2024

  Life is literally a roller coaster ride for me at the moment. I look forward to the moments in between where the way may be a little bumpy but I can see the positive's that lay ahead. It's the ups and downs in between that have the most impact at this moment, and riding them…

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