This time, baby, I’ll be bulletproof.

Okey Dokey.

After a month of ambiguous cliffhanger style (false)ending, I am back. 

Like a little bitch.

Anyway, I am in a pretty good mood – despite the fact that I (stupidly)decided to ‘quit’ my job through the productive, socially responsible method of no-call no-showing.  Awesome.  Burnin’ bridges like a pyromaniac, as usual.

So I wallowed in my irresponsibility for about two weeks, and am now starting to look around me and realize that I live in fuckin’ squalor.  Depression can really blind a bitch, can’t it?  from facts, and delusions equally.

Anyway, the reason for my irresponsibility was the fact that I had an AMAZING interview for a full time job at a company that I think I would be very good for – I mean honestly, the interview was fucking amazing.  The interviewer lady even unconsciously changed the frame of reference for me working there from (an example) ‘IF you were in this position, you’d be blanking’ to ‘WHEN you’re in this position, you’ll be blanking’ – SERIOUSLY FUCKING UNCONSCIOUSLY changed her frame of reference, and then I had a second, impromptu interview with the HEAD OF HR that started with us having mild friendly banter about unique names (since I have a ‘unique’ name, and ALL OF HER FUCKING KIDS happen to have ‘unique’ names) and this impromptu interview lasted for about an hour and a half.  Lots of smiling, nodding, and positive feedback abounding

EVERYTHING WENT FUCKING PERFECTLY

and I no-call no-showed to my nightshift factory job the sunday before the monday I was supposed to hear back on this AMAZING interview.  Anticipating a positive response, evidently.

But they haven’t called me back, and it’s been two weeks and two days.  I just called the lady as a ‘follow-up’ to the interview, which is a poorly guised ‘desperation’ call to find out the bad news and end the fucking agony of being in the dark.  Even though the irrational hope I’m clinging to is fading rapidly in the darkness of the way the world works, I’m still optimistic.  It’s probably just this stupid, quintessential euro-pop I’m listening to.

Knowing the world, it’ll slap me in the face with the fact that me no-calling no-showing to ONE job was the reason I didn’t get the OTHER job.

Yeah, that’s probably it.

Right, world?  You work that way, don’t you?  You’re supposed to, anyway.

This time – I’ll be bulletproof
this time, baby, I’ll be bulletproof.

whatever.