Alone

As the rain pours down outside…the slight trickle of water runs down my window…and I think about him.

I try not to let the tears fall…but already my eyes are brimming over with them.

Why now?  Why does it have to be this way?  Confused, I look over at the rain.  If only my life were as calm as this light rain falling outside of my window.  If only…

I could go on with the if onlys…but the list would be a mile long.

Why does my heart feel like it’s going to sink into my stomach?  Why do I feel so alone?  I can’t even answer these questions that I’m asking myself.  All I know is…I feel alone again….always alone. 

Will it always be this way?

I keep hoping it won’t be.