2nd day

I’ve had a nice lie in (thanks to the sidating anti depressants) and a lazy morning to go with it. Only just finished my porridge.

Paul came round lastnight with Ava. I realised this morning that I miss living with him. If it weren’t for the fact that he mithers me for sex and intimacy everynight I would be there. He thinks he’s the victim in all of this. He has a girlfriend who doesn’t tend to his sexual needs because she’s suffering and has lost her sex drive all together. TYPICAL MAN! Our relationship has survived me moving back in with my parents and just seeing eachother a few nights a week till I can get my problems and isues sorted. I miss Ava so much though. She knows how to put a smile on my face no matter how low I am. I can’t wait to have my own children someday, if I ever get round to having sex again!

Today I have a list of things I’d like to do. The psych yesterday told me to start giving myself little achievements to aim for each day and to treat myself everytime I accomplish them. I am starting small. Today my list consists of
1. Searching for a good self help book on the net (altho a trip to borders when my I’m up to walking would be best)
2. Looking for a good, cheap mouse for my new laptop!
3. Making myself a wheat free fortnightly menu to help me stick to it.
4. Look for a disney theme for my desktop.
5. Making flourless brownies as soon as Paul comes round this afternoon!

This list is easy peasy.

My mood today is good considering I’m still coming round from the anesthetic and I’m not very mobil. I’d like Paul’s company though. The house is empty and I’m getting bored.

Time to get started on my list.
x