Blair to apologise to America.

Central Reservation Affiliated Press:

Downing Street comfirmed today that the Prime Minister will issue a “full, frank and sincere” apology to America during the next session of Prime Ministers questions.

The apology is regarding the move to LA Galaxy by David Beckham who will be joined by his wife Victoria.

Mr Blair is expected to point out that while a lot of Premiership clubs were reportedly interested in signing Beckham, the fact that none were willing to meet his demands lead to this catastrophic event.

The apology mirrors the one issued to Spain in 2003 when Beckham moved from Manchester United to Real Madrid.

There is no word yet if the Spanish government plans to issue a similar apology.

A spokesman for the White House said that unless an apology was issued the move would be seen as “tandamount to an act of war.”

“The only bright side to the whole situation is the effect on the American economy. After all, what does Victoria Beckham do, if not shop?”

There was no comment from Mr Beckham, Real Madrid or LA Galaxy.