a problem?

I find myself thinking more and more about eddie.  Planning a future for us, realizing that I am never gonna be comfortable around bryan again.  What do I do.  The combination of the two is driving me nuts.  But eddie says wait, be patient, wait till he has a job, can support me moving that driection… I am afraid, afraid that once that happens,  it will be wait till he has some savings, then till he gets a divorce, then till he gets established… I can already see how thats gonna work… and it terrifies me.   I will give him my heart, but I am scared he will stomp on it.  that he wont understand what I am asking.  I wonder what he thinks about? Does he have the same fears about me? I think it would be good to discuss this, but it is hard to bring it up.  I love him, I love bryan, but I know that I have to try to make it work with bryan first, but unless something changes, i will never feel safe ehre again