Unconditional love

I talked to Anna about it and got some ideas.  I also had a good look at my natal chart.  Saturn certainly looks like the most likely suspect.  It’s the apex of both a grand trine and a T-square.  I’m in the tail end of my Saturn return, and I get really sick with endo whenever Saturn transits a house cusp. 

Anna thinks the core of the issue might be about unconditional love.  My folks and I have differences, but I’m trying to find common ground.  Trying to find a way we can still be loving in spite of it.  I probably do that with everyone.  And I’m utterly confused about why they aren’t doing the same. 

And so I’m just trying harder and harder myself.  I blame myself when it doesn’t work.  I think what I need is an understanding of why some people just don’t love unconditionally. 

Psychological maturity, Anna says.  Soul age.  Most people just aren’t up to there yet, and there’s nothing you can do about it.  There is no magic overnight personal growth formula.  (Especially not one that can be used on others.)

Thinking about it, I know that Love/Hate is the issue defining Mature souls.  So anyone Mature soul or younger hasn’t fully mastered it.  As an Old soul, it comes more naturally to me. 

I guess, as an old soul, my needs for acceptance and intimacy are stronger than those of younger souls.  I’m never going to get the sort of connection I need from people who don’t have similar needs.  Time I started seeing people as they are.