The Past the begining of the future or the end…

As i looked back at some of last months entries i realzied my relationships and friendships have gone down hill so much. i say this because talking to skip about my haunted dreams entry made me think i was pushing him away when all i really want to do is cuddle and just talk face to face. because anymore its just online that we talk.

and Bishop wont just open up and talk to me either its like forcing them to talk to me not because they want to but because i make them talk to me.

thats why i say the past is the begining of the end and the future because i will probably end up comparing guys to them and end up completely alone because no guy will match up to either of them.

trying to sort out what i want and need from all these emotional feelings is so hard. this is the first time i have felt completely confused and utterly hopeless since the 7th grade.

lataz all