double grrrrr…

wow its been awhile since a real entry. okok…here goes.

i’m moving out with sherman…yes i said it. i’m moving hopefully sometime withing this month. things at home have gotten worse. well at least now because we’re moving…AGAIN! this is a ridiculous cycle that i quite frankly do not want to deal with anymore. we’re supposed to be moving in with my sister…again. and this time around my sister wants to lay down some rules. watch these they’re funny….

1. my brother and i have to do ALL the chores…yes like slaves.

2. my brother has to clean out the fuct up yard she has created over 6 months everyday.

3. my brother (having a job) has to pay some bills…keep in mind he’s only 16.

4. I have to get a job and pay bills…keep in mind i’m trying to graduate here…i wouldnt mind a job but bills already?

5. if you are unemployed you get extra chores to make up for the absence of a job.

6. I cant see sherman during the week or go out for that matter. my brother cant go out either.

7. i have to watch my niece everyday after school and pick her up too.

8. on saturdays…MAYBE…if she decides that we have been good throughout the week…we can have…maybe…one friend over at the house.

9. on “family night” we will watch her favorite movies and play monopoly. we must all participate as, and i quote,”a happy family”.

10.the computer, which was purchased by my aunt for everyone to share for school work, entertainment, etc., will be kept in her LOCKED room.

11.no one will use the computer unless she approves of it.

12.we cannot spend more than 1/2 hour on the computer.

13.we must respect the house. (wtf does that mean arent we the ones maintaining it?)

14.we must respect her…yes please respect the hypocrite.

15.we must walk to school every morning because she is paranoid that she will get a ticket for dropping us off….here’s the story behind this one…LAST YEAR she attempted to drop us off at school but instead of driving into the school itself she decided to drop us off on the side of the road next to the school. a cop saw this and gave her a ticket. yes it only happened once. yes it was a year ago. yes she is still paraniod. (she’s f*ckin nuts)

…

i cant think of any more that she mentioned but i will say that she’s a bitch. she’s a little like this guy i read about.

the computer situation is completely out sense. here’s that story. with the computer we would do our daily lil things that normal people do on a computer. i used it for school reports and scholarships along with the entertainment aspect of it (myspace, od, etc.). she used it for ONLY myspace and email. my brother used it to simply look up guitar tabs and put music from his cd’s to the computer. AFTER we moved out (or rather we were kicked out) the computer completely broke down. it wouldnt even turn on. she called us right away and told everyone that me and my brother put a virus in it. she ranted on and on to all the adults that we would download things and mess everything around to the point that a virus attacked. WHAT THE F*CK?! now my aunt fixed the damned thing and in the report it said that a piece of hardware was simply broken and it was replaced for free. we told her this and she said no that there was a virus. it was in a f*ckin geek squad report. eh. and everyone believes her. she doesnt want us using the comp anymore (well except for that 1/2 HOUR a day). we continuously tried to tell her that it wasnt our fault and that it was a hardware problem NOT a virus. we even asked her if she knew how a virus could attack a comp and she literally said no and that she didnt care.

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!

this is who my mom intends for us to live with. i told her that it was bullsh*t and i was moving out with sherman. i mean if i’m gonna pay bills it’d be better to pay them there. she told me that it was ok for me to go and move out but that i shouldnt expect to come back. she also took the time to mention that i shouldnt expect that i can ask her for help because its just not gonna happen.

jesus christ (forgive me) dont you just love the sense of family here?

i spoke with sherman and he said it would be ok. he spoke to his mom and she’s actually relieved at my decision and wanting to help. i told my friend nataly and she even said that if ever i needed a place to stay that her doors were open.

i just want things to be ok. i need a job. i mean really this is gonna go and interfere with everything i’ve been doin for school. goodbye big and pretty scholarship. my mom hasnt even done her taxes. i told her in november and have been constantly reminding her to do them in january. but alas its almost the deadline date (feb 14) and she’s got nothing done for me. so in that case….goodbye financial aid. and thus goodbye education.

everything i’ve slaved for and down it goes. seems like i’m just one of them…destined only to go nowhere. *sigh

i hope things turn out for the better. i’m thankful at least to all those that do care and want to help. i love you guys. and to sherman, i love you for making my everyday better after all that i have to put up with.

Hey you big star

Tell me when it’s over (cloud)

Hey you big moon

Guide me to shelter

Cause I’m through

When the two

Hits the six

And it’s summer (cloud)

Come (shove it, shove it, shove it)

Shove (shove it, shove it, shove it)

The sun (shove it, shove it, shove it)

Aside (shove it aside)

I think God is moving it’s tongue

There’s no crowds in the street

And no sun

In my own summer

The shade is

a tool

A device, a savior

See I try and look up

To the sky but my eyes burn

Come (shove it, shove it, shove it)

Shove (shove it, shove it, shove it)

The sun (shove it, shove it, shove it)

Aside (shove it aside) repeat

I think God is moving it’s tongue

There’s no crowd in the street

And no sun

In my own summer

Come (shove it, shove it, shove it)

Shove (shove it, shove it, shove it)

The sun (shove it, shove it, shove it)

Aside (shove it aside)