Heat, Cold, Chronology

— | – I can’t read that.
— | — It says ‘Claire’.
Pause
At the end of the exhale
Quietly
— | – Now I won’t forget.

__________________________

— | – This is how we spend our days.
She remarks, long before the boy gets there
But there is no measure of time
From her spoken words
To the moment the boy appears in the doorway
The bathroom is in the centre of the living-space
It has no external windows
She leaves the light on
Until she stirs or wakes or feels her eyes fatigued
Then she turns it off
Nothing is regular
There is a sense of ritual
Of the partaking and purging of sustainence
Now separated from any beneficial structure
Any meaningful structure
Nevertheless, at random, she gets up
Exits the bathroom
Goes to the kitchen
Applies force to the tap, twisting at the wrist
Drinks
Sets the glass down
Returns
Leans against the tiles
Sinks to the floor
Sits
Watches
Watches nothing
Inhale
Exhale

The boy appears in the doorway
Or in some proximity
She does not hear foot-scrapes on the tiles
That doesn’t mean he does not enter
She doesn’t look
The ruffle of clothing
Sway
And he turns and leaves again
Chronology
She does not hear sounds from outside the living-space
That does not mean they aren’t there
She doesn’t remember concern
Only the vagueness of rituals in muscle-memory
Maintained by repetition
Turns away from the sink
Walks back to the bathroom
The boy stands in the doorway
She moves slowly and doesn’t stop
He steps back
She enters
Closes and opens her eyelids in a slow blink
Leans her forehead and shoulder against the tiles
Lowers herself to the floor
— | — Who is that?
He may be pointing
She doesn’t look at him
— | – My sister.
There are other facts that she is aware of
Or things she assumes are facts
Perhaps she makes it up as she speaks
— | – Her name is Natalie.
The boy approaches Natalie
Sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall
Hair over her face
Arms limp by her sides
He stands before her
Breaths are not counted as a measure of time
The boy turns to look at her
Turns his body and approaches
Stops
She sits with her knees tucked up against her chest
Bare arm hooked over them
She turns her head slightly and looks at him
— | – I don’t know my name.
The boy inhales
Exhales
Steps forward once
Raises his arm and extends a finger
Touches it against her forearm
Drags it down
Lines, shapes and dots burn into her flesh
Extending down towards her elbow
He stops
Lowers his hand
Looks at the symbols
Then at the woman
She looks at him

The boy steps back
Lowers himself to his knees
Leans forward, placing one hand on the floor-tiles
He extends his other hand
Points with one finger
Drags it across the tiles
The ceramic scrapes away
Dust accumulates between the gouges and the shapes
He pauses to set the hand down
Lifts his other hand
Brushes the dust away
Sets it down again
Continues