Because you are not privileged

I don’t know why you do it
Why you keep it from the others
– Because…
Why you show me
– It’s because…
You do this to me
Every time
And I let you
I want you to
– It’s because I feel some affection for you.
– Or something like malice.
Perhaps they are the same thing
– You’re privileged in this way.
Hidden things that no-one else sees
Beautiful, frightful things
Things that make me look to you
Even as I clench my teeth
– I don’t know what I’m doing.
But I know what you’re doing
And it’s doing me damage
Something I can’t hate you for
After all these years