My Narcotics Could Kick Your Ass

Well, today I had that whack of appointments I mentioned. Yargh, I’m tired.

My doctor had some wonderful, beautiful news for me. Even though the health board won’t let me stay on oxycodone any longer, there’s a new product out now, which is buprenorphine in a controlled release patch. It works just like a nicotine patch, or a birth-control patch – you just stick it somewhere on your body, and it releases a gentle soothing flow of opioid narcotics directly into your bloodstream, making eeeeeverything just feeel niiiiccceeeee……. =P~~

Goodbye stupid pills to have to take, hello happy sticker permanently stuck on me!! And each patch lasts non-stop for a week…. oohhh yeeeaaahhh….

Dentist scraped my teeth a lot, I spat like half a pint of blood… mmm, sexy…

And, I had my first appointment with this new psychologist… and I have to say, I can totally see myself getting all transference crush on her… she’s quite young, possibly even younger than me, and very pretty, and has a lovely voice… I mean, she seemed to have many excellent professional qualities as a therapist too, but as a lonely single male, I’d be lying if I didn’t say that my very first immediate impression was a physical one. =P

Oh, and apparently I caught a viral infection that lasted about three hours. That’s gotta be one for the medical books. Apparently my aunt had it, then my mother caught it, and at 1PM today I started exhibiting the exact same symptoms, after spending an hour with my mother, but not having discussed it with her. I told her how I was feeling, she told me it sounded like I had what she had. Then at 2PM, I told my doctor about my symptoms, didn’t mention what he mother said, and he independently confirmed that there’s a virus going around right now with those exact symptoms, and that I was in the first day and I was going to feel a lot worse before it got better.

By 5PM, I felt no worse than any other day, not nauseous, not dizzy, just sore and tired, which is normal for me.

If I don’t get nauseous tomorrow, I’m going to write to a medical journal and tell them to publish an article about my miracle immune system. They should take cells from me and use them to cure cancer. =D

But also tomorrow, I’m going to put one of these patches on… mmmm…. =)

I’m going to try going to sleep after this entry. It’ll be about 10:30PM here by then – about 3-6 hours before I’d usually try to sleep. But part of my therapy for my insomnia at the moment is that I’m not allowed to use my bed for anything besides trying to sleep – no more TV in bed, DVDs in bed, eating in bed, even reading my book before sleep… so far, I don’t like this at all… but I’ll stick with it for the week and see if it makes any difference to my general inability to sleep well.

I guess it’s just lucky I don’t have a sex life anymore – it’s a lot harder to get stains out of the furniture than it is to just change the bedsheets… >=P