(drunk) blogging

Bummer.

my new 2 day a week job said, oh yeah, well next week we dont want you for the full 8 hours, we just want 2.25 hours, is that ok?

uhm, seriously?

because I just budgeted my whole month based on the expected income of this job, what am I supposed to do? how am I supposed to live on $45 instead of $160?

ugh.

I didnt feel mad, just sad. really sad and discouraged.

I spent a good part of today correcting my professor’s mistakes again in her posting. I sent a list to the dean, showing her the typos posted in just one posting. to give you an idea of the scope of the errors, the original posting was 3.5 pages, my list of quotes of typos and misspellings was 2.5 pages. that’s pretty much every single posting she does. I havent a clue what quite a few sentences meant, I cant parse them out based on context or screwy wording. I absolutely havent a chance of guessing at what she meant.

want to know the dean’s response?

the dean said the professor was consistently highly rated by students, and she sent my notes to the professor (deleting any identifying information so she won’t know it was me).

are you freaking kidding me? this is grad school! this school is accredited! and you’ve got a professor who cant even edit her own writing, it’s so full of errors. every single document is full of errors. and you just tell me she’s highly rated? you’re not going to do anything about the fact that this professor submits instructions, the course syllabus, and every single document riddled with grammatical and spelling errors? A good number of them you could catch with Word’s spell and grammar checks.

I’m so disappointed. I really expected immediate help. silly me.

and then somehow K made it all worse.

he’s got this condescending tone with me, as if I’m supposed to know things already.

he basically said I blew it by just giving quotes to the dean, I should have printed out the original document, highlighted errors to give the dean the scope of the mistakes, and how dumb it was to just list errors one by one. then scanned it and sent it to the dean.

uhm, he hadnt said that, and the actual email to the dean was complicated. there’s no email address posted, you have to submit your comments on a webpage and hit send.

I was so furious that he was doing that condescending voice to me again (he did that recently about the whole musician problem when I asked him for help with my thoughts spiraling into negativity, he was baffled by the fact that his condescending tone upset me).

I dont think he knows he’s being condescending. nevertheless, it’s pushing my buttons.

I tried to tell him, I asked him why he was using that tone with me, why he was acting like I should have known, he claimed he’d told me before (he wasnt nearly so specific in instructions before and I didnt understand them, I thought he meant a program to run on word for editing, and he still doesnt know about the complicated process to send an email to the dean via a webpage without an email address).

I gave him a couple warning comments, and he didnt stop, so I got up, grabbed my jacket and put it on, grabbed my purse, keys, and my phone and walked out without a word. I definitely did not want to hear that tone and he wasnt getting the message.

and I didnt know where to go. and it was freaking cold. so I just started walking.

I ended up at a bookstore, looked at a lolcats book and just read every page. and a book with a title that was something like, ‘everything will be ok’ and had pictures of positive messages – pasted on bus stop signs, on tshirts, and the like. cute. didnt cure anything, but I expect it helped.

he’s a great man, but 1% of the time is clueless. so. hopefully he will get a clue and stop being mean to me, because I absolutely cannot tolerate condescension. I can tolerate enough to give a few warnings, and then I cant take it anymore.

now I’ve drunk a Paradise (gin, brandy, orange juice) and took a valium and ibuprofen to help with the excruciating pounding pain in my neck that has been going on for 4 weeks now.

I’ve been to the chiropractor twice, have another appointment tomorrow. if this doesnt work, forget it. nothing is working: not ibuprofen, not ice, not heat, not stretching, not my neck roll.

4 weeks of such pounding pain that I wake up at 4 am dying in pain.

and I still have the damn cough, a month and a half! geez.

oh, and if you were wondering about the old family I work for, I sent them another email explaining that I tried texting then got their message that their phones werent working, clearly they hadnt gotten my text, so I emailed them, as they said they had occasional wifi, to tell them I had gotten 2 new jobs.

I just wanted to explain why I sent it in email, and how their technology access problem affected that.

they said that was fine, but they were surprised and disappointed I only gave them 5 days’ notice when they had given me 4 weeks’ notice and they didnt have to and they felt disrespected and all that. and they had to work hard to line up childcare when I just dropped this on them at the last minute.

seriously?

so I wrote the nicest nicest email back, saying I apologized for my misunderstanding, but they had told me specifically that if I found a job sooner, I could leave early and go ahead and take the job. they didnt ask for any amount of notice, they said they could work out childcare.

and just so you know, they are such whiny disgruntled bitches. they had the mother in law to watch the baby, fortunately she was available.

but you know, they didnt tell me what they would do if I left early, they just said go ahead and go!

so I nicely said in my email that if they had made a request for notice, like a week, I would have honored that. but they told me to go early if it worked out. and they didnt tell me their situation, so I couldnt possibly have known what their set up was for childcare.

and they gave me notice anyway. why bother staying with a job that is ending?

anyway. I did the super nice thing by writing that email, but am just counting my lucky stars that I was ready to move so fast, and found two great jobs. well, at least one is great, one is ok so far. the job with the baby is really great, the mom is just fabulous and I keep saying to myself how grateful I am for this job!

and deep down I just want to tell them, suckers!

you’re just really mad that I replaced you so damn easily!

and you told me I could go at any time! so I did!

and dont go boohooing to me about how you just got back from vacation to find out I left you – you did the exact same thing to me when I got back from vacation and it was stressful, let me tell you! you know what that was? that was karma. you did it to me and look, it happened right back at you, without me even trying or devising that.

you know, a few months ago, I started praying about that job situation since it was so stressful and unhappy. And I prayed for things to improve or change.

It seems like those early prayers seemed to pave the way for change to happen at the right time.

Maybe that’s why I found new work so quickly and easily. I’m still amazed.

anyway. just a mishmash here of thoughts when I’m medicated and drunk. I needed to talk, since I’m not talking to K ton