4-21-2025

Monday marked 2 months, 8 weeks since your whore came forward and ended your perfect life.

Let’s do a recap shall we?

I have heard all of the following things since she decided it would be best for everyone involved if the affair came to light. Including and not limited to:

-I love you
-I am all in, 100%, all in
-I deleted all of the Facebook groups, apps, and her number
-You can have until July 4th to make your decision
-I want us
–She was just a friend with benefits
-I couldn’t cum when I was with her
-I came inside of her and never used protection because she was “fixed”
–She’s crazy
–She lies
-I was never going to tell you
-I stayed for the house
-Fuck you
-Leave, get out then, kick rocks, there’s the door
-I won’t look elsewhere if you give me what I want
-I don’t want to talk about the affair, especially if its the same questions
-You lied to me
-I never lied to you, I have been honest
-You didn’t/weren’t giving me sex
-I’m trying you aren’t
-I’m tired of your games

I’m pretty sure you can see that the biggest complaint/demand is “I’m tired of your games” – well tough shit honestly, I am tired too. I am tired because for a year I WAS trying to work on our relationship – it wasn’t the way you wanted it – so YOU stepped out.  For 1.5 years I was left being yelled at, told I wasn’t good enough, 100% of the blame was put on me. When all you had to do was fucking be honest. I asked you directly to your face about her and YOU LIED. You LOOKED ME in my eyes and PROMISED me. So excuse me if I no longer trust you, if I waiver between staying and leaving – you literally mind fucked me for a year. All while creating a false fantasy life with someone else. And the saddest reality is you had to make me look bad to make yourself look good.

I’ll repeat that:

You had to make me look bad to make yourself look good. 

Here’s the harsh reality. You may “love” me, you may “want me/us”, and you might be “trying” – but as I have asked you; why now? Quite honestly what is the point, how are the next 20 years going to be any different.  It is NOT my responsibility to change – as I said to the whore “I am offering him nothing different at this point in our lives than I did a year ago” and I stand by that. I’m not apologizing, I’m not changing who I am, I am not doing anything to myself for you.  I already did that, for 20 years and learned I’m a pawn in your life that you want to move according to YOUR plans.

You did apologize; generically the night the affair was exposed and again via a text message when I said that I deserved an apology. Hell you apologized to her over and over for fucking stupid bullshit. When you put more effort into your affair than you do saving your marriage – it speaks volumes. But I deserve to hear how I am amazing and that loosing me would devastate you, losing 20 year with me would crush your soul. I deserve to hear how sorry you are and want is needed to help move past, forgive, forget, and heal. I don’t deserve to hear your rules for the situation you created.

YOU HAVE ZERO RIGHTS TO MAKE DEMANDS.
YOU HAVE ZERO RIGHTS TO MAKE RULES FOR MY STAYING
YOU HAVE ZERO RIGHTS TO TELL ME WHEN, HOW, AND WHAT TO FEEL

YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO SILENCE ME.

⁑ DISCLAIMER ⁑
Remember: you are reading MY “perspective” of given events.  These writings are MY feelings; whether they are present tense – written in the moment, past tense – drafted during the day, or anticipated – futuristic.  All information provided is what I know from the information I have been given. As with any and every situation there are multiple sides to share the account. It is at the discretion of the reader to which side they favor.