I’m a long, long way from giving up

If there’s one thing I know about myself is that I have been tested more times than I’d like to be. When I came back to Opendiary when it was brought back to life, I realized that I didn’t need it as much now as I did back in some of my darkest days. However, thinking about it since the comeback  I have been tested in so many ways  and yet I never really sit down and write out my thoughts or words.  Though now I think I’ll do that. This past week I was hit by Hurricane Beryl pretty hard, and its tested me in ways. Anxiety hit high, and I’ve had several of those anxiety attacks. The odd thing was these felt different. There’s been this tightness in my chest I feel before one, and it’s hard to make conversation after and during. It’s hard to process and I had minimal damage.

Thing is I think 2020 rewired everything about me and changed a lot of things about what happened and what went on.   I think that can be said though for everyone. The thing is just when I think I have anxiety under control it hits like it does. I know it happens and I have come quite a long way with everything. I just know that I’m tested quite a lot and as  I navigate this life of mine I learn more and more.