Tiger Blood

Oh Charlie Sheen…..stop talking.

Spring break is Finally here. This school year has felt really long, surprising given that I was on maternity leave until October. I am finding that this school has by far the highest standards/expectations for our school than any other I’ve worked at. It’s great because I have been pushing myself more than I ever have, and I’ve become a much better teacher. The downsides are constant stress ( I always feel like I need to be doing more), lack of family time ( I sometimes feel like Will and I just switch off on kid duty, but never seem to make enough time for eachother.

My two best friends are pregnant. I am trying not to catch baby fever, but I think it might be too late for that. One of my best friends(since seventh grade) and I had a pretty big fight yesterday that I am feeling terrible about today. She has been dating Sean on and off for 10 years. I used to be really supportive of their relationship because  I knew he made Ashley happy. Throughout the past several years I have watched him do horrible things to her (cheating, staying out all night without telling her where he was, constantly smoking pot–wasting his Best Buy paychecks on weed, etc.). He lives at her house for FREE. She pays the bills. She takes care of everything, and in my opinion he freeloads off of her. She has broken up with him a few times….only to get back together with him because she is afraid of life without him. They have a six year old daughter. The fight originated because 3 months ago Ashley told me she was afraid she might be pregnant again. She wasn’t taking bc regularly, so I feel like she was hoping to get pregnant. Although I never told her this, I was worried for her to have another baby with Sean. I feel like she is settling. She is such a different person when he is not in the picture.When I asked her about it a couple of days later, she lied to me and told me she got her period. So yesterday at the park she tells me she actually IS pregnant, and has been keeping it from me for the past three months. Ashley is like a sister to me. We (or so I thought) tell eachother EVERYthing. I was hurt that she had lied to me/not trusted me with her secret. We talk EVERY day. I was upset that she never told me what was going on (doctor’s appts, stress, fear, anything). I got pretty emotional and upset(I kept my reaction inside when she told me her news, but texted her later). I regret this because it was immature of me. I am still a little confused by why I felt so hurt. It’s her pregnancy–her news to share. What I needed to do was put my feelings aside and be a good best friend. So today I called her to apologize-she sent my call to voicemail. I texted her, but she said she was still upset with me. Not sure where to go from here. I miss her already. We have never had a serious fight before.

I’ve enjoyed my days home with the boys this week. We went to the park yesterday. Tomorrow we are going to the Zoo with one of my teacher friends and her kids.

Gavin is starting to look like a mini Jacob. He has lighter hair than J and blue eyes, but other than that he looks exactly like J did at 7 months. I am hoping they start to look more and more alike–I think it’s so cute when siblings resemble each other. Jacob LOVES Gavin. He has a hard time remembering that Gavin is smaller than he is–we haven’t really mastered ‘gentle’ yet.

Gavin is an incredibly easy baby. He is so happy and content. He even puts himself to sleep–we put him in his crib awake and he just lays there until he falls asleep. Jacob was never (and is still not) like that. So far it seems like their personalities are very different.

Jacob talks constantly and says the cutest things. He always says "We best friends, right mom?". I love him more every second. I like this stage where he can communicate with me, but he mixes things up and everything comes out so cute.

I won a free three night four day stay at a luxury condo in Branson, Missouri from our school auction. My parents are going to watch the boys so that Will and I can do a weekend away with friends.

I am trying to get back into a workout routine. I haven’t worked out consistently since Jacob was born!! I used to be obsessed with working out. I am not sure where that went. I wish I could find a happy medium. I am a "skinny fat". I don’t weigh a lot, but my body has no tone to it, and it only looks good in clothing. I am trying to spend more time out of clothing with Will. 😉

Hope life is going well for everybody! I love reading about all that you’ve been up to!