Personal thoughts

So, taking a leap of faith, not sure where it will go, but going to jump. I am a little stressed, I lost my job, so doing door dash to keep floating. I am currently learning about a business I have no clue about, so it scares me. My niece designs websites, and I am going to be project support, which is like a secretary of sorts, I will upload clients’ info, and do schedules, and keep up with everything. It’s a lot at least for me. There are a lot of software that is used, and to learn. Then there is Thomas the love of my life, who is at the end of a 10-year sentence. And I am just not sure if we should see where things go or if I keep moving like I have been, by myself. Sometimes being alone is lonely but I also do not have to deal with all the drama of a relationship I can come and go as I please, I have no one to answer to. I so enjoy my freedom, plus there are trust issues, he always, knows what to say and do to make me think he is changed, and that he has learned a lot, however every time he gets out of anything, he finds someone else, but supposedly I am his soul mate, we have been lovers and friends since we were 18 and we are both now 47, and old and settle, maybe it will work I just don’t know. it’s complicated. I have not dated anyone in like 6 years, I have made my life all about my kids. and I am doing what’s best for them. But one of them is 20 now and has moved out and the other is 12, so do I keep making it all about my kids, or is it time for me to have a personal life? Well now this online diary, keeps saying make sure to fill required fields and I am not sure what it wants me to do😅 I have tried everything and I do not know what it wants. I am really scared of this new job and worried. What if I can not figure out the software, what if I am not good at customer relations, and getting schedules done. Bl