More Caring….

Greetings from Amman. I can’t  believe that I just saw the man who normally meets me at the airport is now working in this new location!  It’s really cool to meet an old contact in a different location where you feel alone.  He just came into this Business Center and said, "Habebe"…which means ‘I love you’…  He asked where I’d been and where I was coming from.  He embraced me and hugged me in the Islamic fashion.  He asked in English, "How have you been?  I have missed you!"  this means a lot coming from a Muslim. 

I have just found out that my friend Lora can’t meet me at the airport…I suspect her child is ill.  I am sorry for that. 

I am SO nervous about returing to the states.  The last time I was there was when I returned for the FEMA business in Louisianna.  I didn’t appreciate my reception at that time.  I was shaken down at every airport.   I returned to assist the people of louisianna and was met with resistance.  Perhaps this time things will be different.  

I must say that I’m left down by my Thai Lady.  I know she is most intelligent.  She is a UN representative for international debates.  I arranged my leave around her schedule.  When I called her the other night, she told me she’s leaving for Singapore for a debate on the day I’m to arrive in Thailand.  What the heck?  I altered my plans and made plans to head  north along the Burma (Myramar), Thai, Laos border with hopes of capturing a Bengal Tiger on film…we’ll see.  She cancelled her plans to attend the debate due to my arrival.  I initially thought – I’ll create my schedule around her schedule…then I thought – fuck it…I can go to some other country.   I checked the prices and given the fact that it’s the xmas season, I can’t get shit out of thailand during that time of year due to the time of year without paying through the nose.  Looks like Chaing Mai or Chaing Rai for this old boy.  It still pisses me off.  Makes me wonder if I want to be involved with a girl who is inconsiderate and doesn’t think about all of the trouble that I went through just so I could arrange to meet her on her holiday.  Guys I work with changed their schedules just so I could come her and meet her.  Men with  families knew how important it was for me to meet her and changed their vacation dates just so I could spend time with her, and now she has changed everything.  I don’t get it.  We had plans.  I can understand if I lived in the same city as her and she needed to cancel.  But when I’m paying loads of blood money and flying literally 1/2 way around the world to see her, I most certainly wish she would be a bit more considerate with me, my feelings, and the trouble that other people I work with went through just so I can be here with her over the holidays.  I was even granted a special 40 vacation by the Program Manager just so I could spend her entire school holiday with her.  Now this.  I don’t get it.  I could have went to another country at the company’s cost.  Now I’m stuck going back to a country I have already been to, and she won’t be there.