Drunken Monkey

I just arrived in China last night.  I’ll be updating my entries when I return to Thailand.  Internet access is difficult to find in Cambodia and extremely expensive in China.  I have a very funny story to tell about a monkey I share a beer with while in Cambodia.

We just left a temple when about 15 monkeys ran across the road in front of our car.  I told the driver to stop, and I got out.  I was immediately met by a little girl selling bananas so people can feel the monkeys.  I purchased some bananas and went to socialize with our alleged ancestors.  Having just purchased a cold beer, I took it with me. 

I approached a suspected distant cousin from my father’s side and offered him a banana which he happily accepted.  I noted he was eyeballing my beer so I offered it as a token of my appreciation for the part his family has played in the whole evolution process.  I stuck his mitts outward and accepted the beer; I’m sure he was extremely grateful because the day was a very hot one.  He raised the ice cold beverage to his tiny monkey lips and began gulping as though he was Sadaam on his way to the gallows, and this was the last drink he would experience on planet Earth.  After taking about seven or so gulps, he sat the can on the ground and let go with a monkey ‘YEE HAW’!  I attempted to take my beer back, but he was having none of that.  He attempted to bite my thumb, picked up the can, and drained more of the cold can.  He suddenly dropped the can, let loose with another monkey ‘YEE HAW"! and scampered off.  I picked up the beer and discovered that it was almost empty.  I walked to the base of a tree where several other monkeys had gathered. 

I began distributing more bananas when I suddenly encountered the drunkey monkey; he was out of control!  He was running at odd angles and fell several times as his sobriety continued to elude him.  He began randomly attacking other monkeys in his AO.  A mother monkey was walking by with her recently born baby monkey.  Drunken Monkey suddenly snared the youth and darted away.  Momma Monkey tried in vain to retrieve her baby when Drunken Monkey suddenly sprinted sideways for a tree’s truck and climbed to the top with his abductee.  A person wearing a uniform approached my guide and spoke rapidly in Cambodian.  My guide translated, "Sir, please stop feeding the monkeys beer."  LOL!!!

In hindsight, I would strongly recommend NOT drinking with a monkey as they can become quite tempermental.