In the Lion’s Den

This, I hope, is the last entry of my year long saga regarding our failing public school system and how my son has suffered as a result of it.  

As you all know, I had to attend the first IEP/MFE meeting up at "other" school yesterday.  It was everything Mrs. B. warned me it would be.  

As I pulled up to the school and parked the car, I noticed Mr. Hall, the principal from "current" school walking up the sidewalk towards the main doors.  He immediately noticed me and slowed his pace to stand at the doors and wait for me.  He greeted me with a hearty and smug "GOOD morning Mrs. L.!"  Just as smugly, I replied, "Good morning Mr. Hall."  I wasn’t about to let this jerk intimidate me.  As we walked into the school, we noticed one other person had already arrived.  We stood around in the main hall to wait for the rest of the evaluation team to arrive.  Mr. Hall never took his eyes off of me unless he busied himself with some banter with "other" school’s principal.  Seems like there’s somewhat of a "friendly" rivalry that goes on between them.

In all, nine people showed up.  When it was decided which room we’d all convene in, Mr. Hall boisterously reports, "Well, I’ve done my job, seems everyone (he looked to me real quick) is here and ready.  I’m going now, bye!"  This pissed me off as I realized that the only reason he even came was to personally make sure that I showed up.  Creep!

Anyhow, to save you all the misery of going through all the dialog that took place, I’ll only point out the more important aspects of the meeting.  From the get-go, the entire meeting was not well planned out. I think we stood in the hallway for about 5 minutes before they even decided which room we’d meet in.  It was finally decided we’d meet in the room of the teacher they were planning to assign Wesley to.    Everyone introduced themselves and then Mrs. N., asked me, "Did you get a chance to look over the evaluation?"  I answered, "Oh yes, I read the whole thing from front to back."  She looked a little taken a-back by that and said, "Oh, well, how nice.  I wasn’t sure if you’d get the chance to."  I countered with, "Well, I fought long and hard for this, so yes, I was eager to read it."  She cleared her throat while a couple of the other women exchanged some glances.  Mrs. N. continued by summarizing all the results of the evaluation allowing for a few comments by the others who took part in the testing.  I interjected a few times to clarify some notations she had written that were clearly false which resulted in her having to redirect.  I don’t think she likes me very much.  Ha-ha!

The whole review took 30 minutes.  Finally, it was time to go over their intervention plans.  What took place could more accurately be described as a bull-spit session and debate.  When it was my turn to talk I mentioned my displeasure over how his 2nd grade teacher and his current teacher had/have his desk at the back of the classroom.  How, In my opinion, it sends a message to him that he doesn’t belong, he’s unwanted and not important enough to pay attention to, which, consequently contributes to his anxiety, the out-of-seat behavior, and his inattentiveness.  I then went on to complain of the lack of discipline, how I felt that it contradicts any incentives they have put in place for good behavior and how it’s necessary for my son if they have any expectation at all of him changing his behavior.  Lastly, I stated the importance of him being in a smaller classroom.  

Once I mentioned the smaller classroom, "other" school’s psychologist pipes up and says, "You just contradicted yourself.  First you say you don’t want him to feel excluded and then you say you want him to be excluded from the normal classroom."  Oh, you can bet this really ticked me off!  I looked him straight in the face and said, "I did no such thing and I resent the accusation.  My son can not function in a normal classroom, that’s what this meeting is all about.  He can be in a small classroom as long as he’s seated WITH his classmates and not separate from them.  THAT is the point I was making."  I wanted to scream at him but I was good, I kept my cool down to a low growl.  For a Doctor of Psychology, that was one of the most stupid things he could have said.

Then, the woman who’s supposed to be my son’s teacher took his side of the issue and said, "Well, we might still have a problem with that.  All seven of my students are fourth graders.  If he’s the only third grader in the class, he’s going to have a hard time feeling like he belongs there."

What the Hell??!!!

Oh my gosh I have had it with these people!!!  THIS, my dear friends, unless you have some remarkable streak of luck, are the kind of MORONS who are teaching your kids!!  

The meeting ended without any decisive plans of where my son would go, who would teach him, how he’d be taught or whether or not he’d be in a self contained classroom or be shuffled around from room to room to accommodate his needs.  They said they’d get in touch with me about rescheduling a follow-up meeting.  My goodness, when Mrs. B. spoke of their lack of professionalism, she wasn’t kidding!!  I told them I was booked up for the next week and have surgery pending, so don’t know when I’ll be available.  My mind was made up before this meeting.  The meeting only helped to reinforce that decision.  There is no way in the world, my son will go to school there.

I left that meeting with my only hope lying in the hands of Wesley’s Pediatric Psychologist and a PDD diagnosis.

Unfortunately, that diagnosis didn’t come.  Don’t misunderstand, I’m very happy to learn that my son’s problems are not related to Autism or anything else in the spectrum of Autism, but, for the sake of his education, I’m very disappointed.  The Spectrum school would have been EVERYTHING he needed.

Well, that’s not entirely true.  There’s Me.

I sat down this morning to fill out the application form for ECOT.  Our home, at least for the rest of this school year, will be my son’s classroom.  

P.S.  Sorry Linda Kay.  I love your idea,  "NoNoBitchMo, for November No Bitching Month," but I promise I’ll try harder for the rest of this month.  Umm….does that include my "Monday’s Morons?"