for some reason.

Its really weird. I am at my parents house in chicago. and i just feel..so weird.

The other night, I was trying to work on my final project for my class. And I just couldnt concentrate.

Lately I have just felt like I have been here, like my min is in a far off place. And my body just feels like shit.

But anyway, yea. I dont know. So I started to write my boyfriend this email about how I was sorry about being this way lately, and then I just started talking about everything that was bothering me, and ended up crying and blah blah blah. it was ickie.

So yea, here I am at my parents house AGAIN. I hope not to come back at least until the end of the summer. But then I told Nathan that if I had some time off work Id come pick him up and take him to my place in st louis.

Well I was on the phone late with my boyfriend last night. But I forced myself to wake up at like 9 anyway. I needed to get up and wrap my nephews birthday gift. (mathew’s, he turned 2 today..well the 5th)

I got that done and I was going to call Nathan, because he had asked me last night if he could spend the day here. But he called me first hehe, and asked me to come over and get him. So I did..and I just decided to bring my niece back with me too.

So we spent the day doing “fun” stuff. We played outside, and we made paper ‘crowns’..and my dad showed us where some baby bunnies live, we went to a pet store..and we visited some old family type friends. We went to the park, then came home and were riding our bikes around..then went to the park again. My sister came and got nate and alexis is spending the night.

Usually, when I come here. And I have the two of them all day long I get so frustrated at everything. At alexis spitting up on me, or crying, or pulling my hair, nathans screaming, hitting, pinching, kicking, whistling, everything..but today was different. Everything was just fine.

There was one time I got frustrated, and it was when I asked nathan to do something, and he said something like “fuck that shit”..and so I spanked him, which I really hate doing. And he cried soo bad too. But whenever he went to swear, he remembered that, and said something else.

I had a horrible headache today. But for once, this headache was a sinus headache and I was able to get rid of it with some advil. very nice. dont mind those headaches at all.

I have to leave to drive home tomorrow, and Im so tired so I should go to sleep. But I dont know. I realllllly dont want to drive all the way back. And not tomorrow, cause I just got here last night. But I have my final project to work on, and I need to do good on it.

I finished filling out the rest of my application, with my moms help, cause Im too dumb. But thats okay, at least I got it done.

I didnt eat much today, I had a bagel and 1 1/2 pieces of pizza. yum.

mathew fed our rabbit some peanut butter and jelly sandwich today..I wonder how its feeling now. lol.

when we were at the park today matt ran into a pull (clumbsy child, see Kirk, I do need to follow him closely hehe 🙂 and started screaming, so I went to run for him, I had my moms shoes on and I tripped and twisted my ankle. Talk aboout funny..I couldnt stop laughing. Im cool what can I say.

yep yep yep. ugh, it annoys me when I write about what I did during my day. heh.

Im going to go.