So I took my mom out to dinner.

Via the networked printer, I gave my mom the option of going to either Chili’s or Olive Garden. She said Chili’s. Actually, we ended up going to El Coyote. Chili’s is where I’ve gone with my friends. It’s the closest thing to Chi-Chi’s. Except. It isn’t, at all. The food isn’t anything special. Decent dessert? I’m sure I can find an electric lemonade elsehwere.

El Coyote has the best chips and salsa. Period. It’s a little pink building on 46 West, right by the circle with 206. Food’s a bit expensive, and I hadn’t had anything spectacular other than the chimichangas (First time I was there, I had a taco salad. God, that was horrible!), yet I’m drawn back again and again. Where else can you order Fried Alligator? Also, you get charged for refills. My dad hates it there. Wendi and I love it.

Seeing as how my mom was paying and I was still hungry from swimming (despite having soap at CCM), I decided to venture into the ribs. This was maybe the second time I’ve had real decent ribs. Ribs at Rutgers don’t count, dude. Want to know what my first experience was? Famous Dave’s. Went to one in Minnesota, I think off 494. Near Woodbury. *waves to people from St. Paul* You know what I remember about those ribs? They were good. And I haven’t had them since. No desire to.

You see, the ribs I had tonight were fantastic. The sauce was awesome. I’m the type that hates putting generic bbq sauce on stuff. But this went perfectly. Also the mashed potatoes were the best I’ve had since Rutgers. (Though, nothing can EVER top how freaking awesome Rutgers mashed potatoes are.) My hands got all messy fast. I ate my mashed potatoes by dipping my fingers into them and sucking it off. Mmmm.

But. This is the but. I have absolutely no reason to ever go back to Famous Dave’s. Why bother? What’s the point?

In my annoyance with the chain-bashers, I’ve theorized that it’s all a matter of what you prefer in an atmosphere. Food? Who goes somewhere for the food? Few places impress me with their dishes. I do not GOTO Chili’s for their food. I go because it’s where my friends enjoy ourselves. It fits best over other places. Yet, at the same time, it was the food that brought us to Chi-Chi’s. We could order anything off the menu. Anything. I can’t say that about a lot of places. Most places kind of suck.

You see, I don’t like being backed into the corner of having to defend chains. What, you think I like “theme restaurants”? Yet the motif works. What “theme” is yours? The popularized ‘theme’ of a chain is no different than the theme of an independent place.

One of the reasons we love Macaroni Grill (in addition to the bread) is when we get Tristen as our waiter. (That and we can write on the table.) That guy is fucking amazing. We drop twenty dollar tips regardless of what we’ve ordered. That has absolutely nothing to do with it being a chain. I’ve had tons of non-descript waiters/waitresses. Flare? I seriously don’t see where this flare is, in any restaurant. All over the spectrum, I’ve had fantastic service, and shitty service. I find no correlation between where you go.

Though, I can easily see Tristen serving 40 dollar steaks at Manny’s. Yes, that’s in the Twin Cities, too. That was the first steak I’ve ever had. That’s a fucking high mark!

My friends an I kind of joke about how we GOTO “another chain restaurant”. You have any better ideas? Pizza is kind of location specific. That’s just not where you go for dinner. That’s where you go when you have an hour to kill before a movie. Diners? That’s for after hours. We don’t venture beyond a ten mile radius, especially with gas prices as they are. Chevy’s is as far as I’ll go. I’ll trek a half hour to Mansfield for Arbys. I will not trek a half hour to Mansfield for Applebees.

I can’t help but think about my normal eating habits. I eat prepackaged crap. ..So? I like it. That’s really all that matters. Eh, whatever. Pray I don’t regret actually writing this out. I knew I should have stuck to the old affirm-deny-disavow format.