Sleeping With A Butt Plug.

I’ve been out for.. a while. I ended up working a hour after I was scheduled yesterday, not surprising. Cliff, Erik, Ashley, and this little dipshit who tagged long popped into Panera the last half hour. Played Smash Bros here after I changed. Got rid of kid. I remember eating at Perkins, Erik’s food being horrible. I was fine. I’ve been told the Perkins in Budd Lake is horrible. *shrugs* I’ve been to the ones in upstate new york plenty of times, and I always had a positive experience.

Dan couldn’t hang out. Meaning Erik and I each had a couch, instead of one of us snuggling with Dan. Everyone snuggles with Dan. He’s just a jew like that.

Managed to stay warm during the night under a small thin blanket all because of the fuzzy inside of my leather jacket. Go me. I knew I should have worn my Nintendo hoodie. Will next time.

Played Star Wars: Battlefront most of the time. Bespin Platforms is our favorite level. That one level with the beach, I’ve made completely stupid. I just run to the end and take their base. … I use their own thing to heal me and stand there, and shoot them while they spawn. After that, they can’t storm the beach. So, they’re relegated to the two side spawn points. Fun, fun.

I had a craving for Drakengard, so plugged in my memory card and played on Cliff’s system. That would be the game with the Watchers and killing babies. Or something. It seems like such an average storyline, and then out of nowhere, it gets REALLY REALLY WEIRD.

…Cliff’s in the process of breaking up with his girlfriend. As simply as I can put it… It’s not that she’s a bad person. No, not at all. It’s that he’s not being fulfilled. You shouldn’t need a reason to end a relationship, you should need a reason to stay in it.

As Cliff relayed it to me, he never intended for it to get this far. He never wanted to date her, let alone have sex with her. He just wanted her to be happy. One of those YOU’VE HELPED ME, PLEASE FUCK ME sort of things.

One of the things that comes to mind is how.. Cliff feels like Jess doesn’t care about anything he says. Jess doesn’t understand. Contrast this with Melody, who would be absolutely fascinated by the shit Cliff can spew. *smirks* Cliff informs me that Jess enjoys asking about his day. If he mentions anybody, she wants to know about them. I hated that feeling with Paige, so I empathize.

I asked Cliff… He’s smart enough where if he were to get into a relationship with her, he would have known what would happen. So why did he let it get to this point? I forget his response specifically.

As I understand it, he’s never dumped anyone before. It bothers Cliff when people think false things about him, and we both know Jess probably won’t get it. I understand it, it’s just hard to articulate. As I said, she’s not a bad person. We like her. It’s just Cliff doesn’t want to be with her. It’s his perogative, and as his friend, I support him.

After wandering off to drop Ashley off (and get food along the way), Erik and I went back to Cliff’s. He was on the phone with her and told us to try him again Saturday, as he would be occupied. Aye.

Aye.

Ashley asks people a lot, “How are you?” In part because she forgets the last time she’s done it. As I pointed out, since she doesn’t remember the last time, she actually is sincere with every time she inquires. How am I? It feels great to be social. Something I’ve missed, for sure. But, as expected, it doesn’t fill that other void. I’ll put that void out of mind and simply enjoy their company.

Erik, Ashley, and I went to the McDonalds in Flanders. I haven’t been inside there in SO many years. It .. looks so different. Seating is the same, I just. Notice differences. How there used to be glass or some sort of vertical architecture around the seats in the middle. We were talking about stuff and I noted how much I’ve changed since High School. In some ways, somehow. I asked Erik if he thinks I’ve changed, as he’s one of the few people who has known me that long.

He said I have.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to buy some CD/DVD drives for Roxanne and some games.

(As for my erratic titles, this one is an inside joke I don’t feel like explaining. It has nothing to do with sleeping or butt plugs.)