Noooez!

It’s quite strange how I’d even be embarassed by this. See, I’ve been upset since I got home from school. I’m worried about my van.

Typically there’s a correlation between my eating habits and something bring wrong. I swear, I don’t mean to, it just happens. Other people binge. I.. starve?

I’m eating chili right now. I’ll try to be more disciplined.

So I was sitting in the school parking lot, letting the van warm up. I do that now, at least three minutes. Sometimes when I’m leaving in the morning, I’ll drive her around the little circle around here. Cars warm up faster when they’re in gear.

So I’m sitting in park, when the RPMs randomly go up. I watch the needle, and can hear the engine go. I check my foot, even pull back the pedal a little. Stays up. I get into gear and start driving. Transmission and all are normal. I eye my various gauges. She’s old, but she can’t die on me. I got home, turned her off, paused, and tried to start her. She struggled, but wouldn’t turn over. The only two things I know how to check are the oil and transmission fluids. Both were fine.

I was thinking a few minutes ago. I remember once this happened. Not the RPM thing, but she refused to turn over. Or something. We ended up cleaning off the spark plugs, and that did the trick. If I have problems tomorrow morning, it’s worth a shot. I have a lecture tomorrow, and a test.

So naturally I worry. Will she start in the morning? I think if I had to get another car, I’d resent the shit out of it. I don’t think too many people still have the car they grew up in. She’s 19 years old.

Of course, my dad doesn’t understand such things as emotional attachment to inanimate objects. My mom says he thinks she babied me too much. *rolls eyes* Of course, I’d never look to him to be empathetic. It’s all tone of voice. If my dad said “I know you’re upset over the van”, it would sound condescending. But if my mom would say the same words, it would come off as genuine.

I need to pee now.