Johnson and Johnson Genital Floss.

Deep Voice: Are you tired of cleaning your genitals the OLD WAY?

Deep Voice: You don’t have to worry anymore anymore, with Johnson and Johnsons’s new Genital Floss!

Middle Aged Woman: But, will it work?

Deep Voice: Yes, it will work!

Middle Aged Woman: Where did that voice come from? ..God?…

Deep Voice: Simply take the Genital Floss and run it in your genitaliac crevices.

Deep Voice: And like that, your genitals are clean!

Man: Wow, that was so easy! Thanks Johnson and Johnson for making genital cleaning a joy!

Deep Voice: Johnson and Johnson Genital Floss is so easy to use, even a child can use it!

Prepubescent Girl: Thanks, Johnson and Johnson, thanks to you, I’m going to look forward to my weekly showers!

Deep Voice: It’s so much fun, you don’t even need to be in the shower to use it!

Man: I didn’t have time to shower this morning. There has to be a way to make my genitals clean before that huge presentation.

Man: Of course, Genital Floss!

Man: Thanks, Genital Floss. Thanks to you, my coworkers won’t smell my balls.

Deep Voice: Hell, Genital Floss can change your entire appearance!

Prostitute: Hey, baby, looking for a good time?

Guy: Yeah, but only if we use some protection.

Prostitute: Oh sure, baby.

Prostitute: Honey, if you don’t want to kiss me, I understand…

Guy: It’s not for your mouth. It’s for your genitals. Fuck if I know where you’ve been.

Guy: Whooo’s your Prom King, baby.

Deep Voice: Genital Floss: Making cleaning the part of your body that matters the most fun again. By Johnson and Johnson.

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October 20, 2003

hey…I actually saw this entry on the OD login page and I was like “Hey,I read his diary!” lol…I’m so proud. 😉

I’m sorry that I heard about this before you posted it and failed to stop it. ^_^() TIMMY! You’re nuts!

October 20, 2003

That was great, I needed that…

October 20, 2003

:DDDD and thank you!

October 20, 2003

::props leopard pillow up for you:: comfy? hope you didn’t mind the plug, this entry just made me laugh.

October 20, 2003

your brain is a twisted cavern of delightful gnomes and periwinkles. yes it is.

October 20, 2003

THAT WAS AWESOME! *laughs endlessly*

October 20, 2003

i really shouldn’t be laughing this hard about genitalia at work, but THANKS!!!!! DAYOM that was FUNNAY!!!!!

October 20, 2003

An old friend and I once had an awesome commercial written for “Easy Bake Baby”. We also actually filmed an infomercial for “Holy Spirit”, which could do anything from flavoring coffee to cleaning up nasty carpet stains. I’ve also thought about creating a “Shake and Bake Baby”… But then I remembered, “Never shake and bake a baby.” Hahahah. Ha.

October 20, 2003

This is EXACTLY what I needed right now. teehee.

October 20, 2003

I mean laughing at the entry. I don’t need Genital Floss, thank you very much.

October 20, 2003

*quits while she’s behind*

October 20, 2003

*rolls over laughing* Oh that was great… I needed a laugh like that today. Thanks Timmy 🙂

October 20, 2003

I could use some Genital Floss this evening. *hot shame*

This is very cool. You, however, are a big git who needs a spanking. Or something. Look, I’ve just woken up, okay?

LOL

You really have too much time on your hands, don’t you? <3

October 20, 2003

hehehe

RYN: In some ways I wish they’d do away with the tipping system, make it so that everyone makes like $10 an hour without tips and be done with it. I hate having my income based on if someone understands they are supposed to give me money at the end of it all. <3

October 20, 2003

you quoted fight club in a note.

October 20, 2003

ryn: ummm…okay. 😛

lol, too funny =)

October 20, 2003

What drugs are you on? Or is your mental landscape naturally warped?

LOVE IT LMFAO

October 20, 2003

I love how “area” is capitalized.

RYN: I loved everything before Untouchables. They lost it on that album and the new song doesn’t sound like they got it back. <3

October 20, 2003

That scarred me for life…But I think I liked it… 😀

October 20, 2003

omg thats almost too funny ~leah

October 20, 2003

Who needs drugs when you have masturbation?

October 20, 2003

*falls on floor laughing* this is priceless 🙂

October 20, 2003

*cracks up laughing* wish I had some genital floss.

For that fine tingling sensation

October 21, 2003

RYN: Vedar gives you boners? Haha….

October 21, 2003

LMFAO!! God Sam would love this…*shakes her head and snorts*

October 21, 2003

*starts crying with laughter* that was simply and plain hilarious -*Maria*-

“genitaliac crevices”. lol. It is offered in flavors for those of us who prefer to pleasure our partners orally? * SPEARmint* Cunilingus curry* ASSparagus

October 21, 2003

Buah ha ha, that’s great!

October 21, 2003

As if I weren’t laughing enough already, Gattaca’s note sent me right over the edge.

This made me think of a story I heard last night where they make a new product that is pretty much a pack of breath mints, but they are for the vagina… vagina mints, who knew?

Hope your balls are clean smeling.

October 24, 2003

This is so funny!!