It’s time to pick up heavy shit.

It’s been coming for a while. I decided that HGM is just making me wish for it to be over. And while it’s awesome to do something and stick with it, I’m man enough to admit I’m not into it. So like so many others, screw this, I’m doing my own thing. I’ve done enough reading, I know how to put together a decent routine. I have a beta of something I thought I’d implement after HGM. Well. You know what? Let’s try it right now.

Right now, I want to focus in on some goals. Let’s annotate them, off the top of my head, for posterity.

#1: Deadlift 315 lbs

There’s many ways to do this, and there’s no need to specifically annotate a long-term plan. That’s right. Screw the plan. I’m too early in lifting to get caught up in things like that.

#2: Stop being shitty at pull-ups.

That’s right, I DO have upper body goals. Pull-ups have been a weakness, so I intend to attack it. I’d like to do sets of ten, and pop off singles with a 45 lb plate attached to me.

#3: Shoulder Press 50 lb dumbbells.

As for overhead pressing, it has both physical hypertrophy aspects I like, and I just like being able to overhead press. Also, I understand that overhead pressing can help your bench, as your shoulders kick in heavily during benching. I know I’ve been accused of having a weenie bench press. : D

#4: Eat.

It could easily be #1, but if I’m going to attack the weights, I better attack the trough. I can get the frequency thing down, but I think it may come down to how much pre-sleep cottage cheese I injest. No gain on the scale, no gain in the mirror.

#5: Squat 275 lbs

Oh yeah, want to pad that, too. But that’s not too imperative, I’d rather work on my work set weight. Can you say squats supersetted with lunges?

#6: Rest for a full week every 3-4 months.

Plan it. Do it.

#7: Keep iron portion of lifting to under an hour.

I don’t necessarily mind if I take a little longer to add some stretching, but if I’m taking over an hour for the lifting portion of my workout, I’m taking too long. I consider the “iron” portion to be from the moment I walk into the weight room, to the last rep of any set, even if it’s dinkie shoulder accessory work. Stretching is more of a cool-down, and moments away from post-workout nutrition.

#8: Keep a rotation of unilateral work.

Something I want to try is a one-armed DB shoulder press. Lunges will be around, as well as bulgarian split squats.

#9: I know I’ll be using mostly compound exercises, but this is just a mental note that if I add any isolation, not to go overboard.

#10: Have fun. I want to run any of my phases for three to six weeks. Why three? If it sucks, better ditch it. Lifting is my time. For all the dick-waving, if I didn’t genuinely enjoy lifting, I wouldn’t do it.

Oh wow, ten things. I am awesome. I suppose it’s good to annotate for personal and public reference those dick-waving personal bests. Though, personally, I like waving my balls.

Deadlift: 2 @ 245 lbs (6-29-6)
Squat: 1 @ 225 lbs (12-30-6)
Bench: 1 @ 135 lbs (12-8-6)
Pull-up: 1 @ 183 lbs {BW +25} (12-8-6)

I don’t need to say anything else, unless there’s any questions. I have this tendency to overexplain myself incessantly. Enough talk. It’s time to pick up heavy shit!