Farewell, Optimus Prime.

I can’t sleep. I’m not sure why. I did get up earlier today than yesterday. I don’t really have anything on my mind beyond radio music. Which is odd, considering I rarely listen to radio. And by radio music, I think of Stone Temple Pilots; that song that has that line “I’m half the man I used to be.” Or the Bush song “Machinehead.” Like I said, radio music. Who actually buys that stuff? Aerosmith is another example of radio music, and I hope I don’t get any of their stuff stuck in my head.

Today is the last day of Optimus Prime. If you aren’t aware, Optimus Prime is our DC hub. …and if you aren’t aware, DC is Direct Connect. ..Direct Connect is an intranet file-sharing program. Apparently, somebody squealed to the higher-ups. It was only a matter of time. So, they’re going to go offline; I’m under the impression an investigation is going to go underway. If you’re wondering why the people at ResNET don’t know, well, the people working there ARE the ones that have been protecting Optimus Prime and keeping it running.

In case it isn’t clear, Optimus Prime is technically illegal. Ha ha. Most of the traffic on the network is no doubt porn transfers. Those Girls Gone Wild videos suck ass. Pathetic. There’s probably plenty of decent porn that I haven’t gotten, but it doesn’t really matter. I’m going to miss the nights of downloading a random guy’s entire collection, then sorting through it in the morning. I’m going to miss MOVIES IN TWENTY MINUTES OR YOUR PIZZA IS FREE! Music isn’t even something I think about because by the time I click it and blink, the song is already here.

Well. Maybe we’ll have another DC hub next year. Maybe…

I wrote around three pages for my Socialism and Communism midterm over Spring Break. Which was due last Monday. I finally bothered to get the zip off my webspace that it was in. One problem: The zip was corrupted. The original is still on my parent’s computer but uh. What the fuck? *laughs*

I still don’t know what topic I’m going to do for Expos 2. I was in the library, thinking. I had just finished thinking about my Socialism and Communism research paper. (Oh joy.) It occurred to me that I had overlooked the original reason I had taken the section I was in. (“Shopping Nation” is the title.) I could do a paper on how shopping is a capitalist phenonemon. I remember reading in one of my Socialism and Communism books about how people began buying and selling things because of overproduction. I thought about how people are materialistic because of the way it makes them look. Then I realized, “STUPID, STUPID, THAT’S ALL THEORY, SHE’LL KICK YOUR TESTICLES IF YOU DON’T USE AN EXAMPLE.” I thought of things we buy. I imagined wealthy landlords selling grain while their peasants starved. Food. Only in a capitalist society will we define ourselves by what we eat. I wonder if vegans exist in socialism. At the very least, vegans did not exist in primitive communism. *smirks*

The more I think about topics, the more I think, “I could sum this up in a few words, because I know the answer(s), and I’m supposed to bullshit twenty pages? Won’t the paper amount to overstating the obvious?” Don’t know, no ideas have really stuck with me. I’m not sure how I’d even go about doing that computer culture idea I had. Research. I don’t feel like I was ever taught how to do research. God damn it. FUCK YOU, RUTGERS. Actually. It’s not entirely their fault. My entire experience here has been one of self-sufficiency. You either learn on your own, or you fail. So. FUCK YOU, MOUNT OLIVE. *flips them off* I don’t feel like talking to my professors does anything for me, beyond moral support.

My pubic hair is still growing. Last Thursday, after showering, I decided to give `em a test rip. Hmm. That hurt a lot. …*laughs* THAT HURT A LOT! And that was just the upper-righthand corner of my now-formed pubic triangle. A couple hairs did come out, forming a small bald spot. Uh. Yeah, they’ll need to be longer. I knew it was too soon, but I was too curious as for how much it would hurt. I also tested again today. OH GOD, THE PAIN, HARDER. Still too soon. I feel incredibly dirty with ballhairs. And I haven’t had armpit hair this long in THREE YEARS. Can’t wait until they’re long enough to Nad.

Listening to …And Justice For All. Again. Not very surprising to me.

That Pablo Francisco “Movie Previews” skit is STILL in my head. Since before Spring Break, I’ve been constantly saying to myself, He had one chance… and his chance was to fight back. Plus that mean Arnie I can do. LISTEN TO ME, LISTEN TO ME, KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN. THEY’RE TRYING TO TAKE MY TORTILLAS!

*yawns* A yawn! I wonder if I’ll fall asleep now. Hmm. We can hope.