If things go right we can frame it

Currently:
Drinking green tea.
Listening to “Lego House” by Ed Sheeran [freaking love this guy’s voice!]
Attempting to grow out my nails.
Contemplating new tattoo ideas.
Getting stupid excited over painting my kitchen.
I have antsy feet, my legs can never be still for too long.
Not sure what “big present” I’m going to get my brother, dudes are so hard to shop for.
 
 
I was going through some old entries from around this time (like at least 2+ years back)…MAN how times have changed in my life. I thought I would share with you a piece of an old entry…enjoy:
 
. . . . . . . . .
the ‘L’ word. 
Such a little four letter word with so many attachments. 
Such a beautiful word…such a frightening word. 
A word that i have used before without knowing the real meaning…without thinking of the repercussions of using the word, repercussions both good and bad. Mostly bad…because i gave something of myself that i was not yet ready to give, not yet knowing what i was giving…not understanding the full meaning of the word. 
I think the biggest problem is that most people do not realize that you give a piece of yourself with that word…you offer yourself to that person. You become completely vulnerable and naked and bare in front of that person. But there is so much beauty in it…when it is at the right time with the right person and the right motives. They will encourage you, build you up, become your other half. They will be selfless and understanding, patient and compassionate…they will love you as Christ would. Love is the most beautiful thing in the world, the most treasured thing, yet also the most misunderstood thing. I believe that if you truly love someone, if you marry them…if they are who God has placed by your side…then there is no "falling out of love" there might be "falling out of like, and fading attracting" but Love will be there, strong and pulsing…it might not always feel like it; but its there. 

i will have a beautiful love
I will have a selfless love.
but most importantly…
i will have a Godly Love
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
 
Yes…
I still agree with a lot of what I said…hmmm. Its nice to know that I’m not a wishy-washy person. I have found that I stand by what I say 90% of the time. That extra 10% changes because of growth & maturity. =) Then again anything I said from about 16 and younger can just be completely disregarded hahaha. I was such a dramatic teenager.
I’ve realized I have a past at being a player. Bahah Ok I know you just imagined me in baggy pants, a sideways hat and big ol’ gangsta signs flashing…you’re right that’s exactly how I look in this current moment. =)
Seriously though, I was. I was a flirt, flirty mc’flirterton. I kissed a lot of boys, had a lot of guy friends that I just hung out with etc.
I’m making myself sound like white trash.
I’m not.
I can think of some situations:
#…. L & S….dang. That was an awesome friendship that I totally effed up. I think steven had a thing for me and I was dumb. We (S, L, S’s parents, and myself) went up to his lakehouse for a weekend…long story short L & myself ended up kissing, then fighting, then I went and fell asleep in s’s bed. WOAH WOAH this was ummm 5 years ago…nothing else happened that’s just the run-down.
S began to hate me after that.
=(
#…. J…..really there have been so many “j’s” In my life…I don’t have to explain who this one was. I was just using him to get over past feelings.
DANG.
I’m a monster.
I really am.

#…Another J, wanted to be with him to make someone else jealous; mission accomplished.
#…L dangggggg this kid used me too. Wow.
 
So all of these situations happened when I was younger.
THANKFULLY I am not that person anymore.
I don’t’ believe in just using someone to fill a void.
I think it is petty, childish, immature, selfish, and completely and utterly wrong.
 
I honestly have no idea where I was going with all of that or why I felt the need to share it. Eh, oh well.
. . .
 
MMkk.
I wish I had more to say. My life is pretty generic right now, I’m sure I’m leaving out some important details…but as of right now there is nothing super pressing to write about.
 
?!?!?!? Any more questions, I might do another video ?!?!?!?!
 
 
 
Chinchilla out.
That’s my new way of saying “bye” …ok no it isn’t I just thought I would try something.