in search of happiness

I sit and ponder over my achievements that have been applauded by loved ones and admired by close friends and family, but it’s not enough.

Sometimes I feel it would better to have nothing and be happy, than have everything and be unhappy?

I’m not saying I have everything because I don’t, “far from it!” But, I have enough, therefore I should be grateful and satisfied right?

No… I’m not.

It’s like something is missing, like I’m searching for something that will bring happiness and a feeling of completeness. Every time I accomplish something, I’m already looking for something new to achieve?

Is this bipolar, or just a personality trait?

I know what makes me happy, but I can’t escape the opinions of society…

I feel I must act and live to a certain set of rules in order to be accepted as somebody who’s achieved in life?

I have a good job, and yes it is well paid but i’m still unhappy? I hate my job and what it stands for!

I want to be independent and support my family by running my own business and creating my own future, the thought of been reliant on somebody else kills me!

Hmmm…..What to do?