Rescue me

I have been watching the miners in Chile rescued one-by-one for hours now, on and off. It’s a reminder that human spirit is alove and well, and that family and friends are so important. It also reminds me i’m terribly claustrophobic. excuse my spelling if that is incorrect. That tiny tube, on your own, for between 10 and 25 minutes? brave, brave men.

Been feeling down again lately, particularly when on my own. In company i’m fine, but i’m easily dragged down by a comment, a thought, or just time to reflect. I’ve not been a great person lately, failing to follow up business calls (even if they are essentially personal begging calls) failing to save money, failing to tidy my house despite promising myself i would, failing to be inspired…

I told a friend recently that i was "a bit over it all". Nothing tragic or suicidal, more the sad amateur dramatic scene that i have for years enjoyed. Anyone who is involved in Drama will know that it’s a world filled with ego and bitching, and quite frankly all the cliques, comments, fallouts and politics have got to me. In the town i live in, there are so many groups doing the AmDram thing. Essentially we’re all doing it because it’s fun. So why is there so much competition? Why all the slagging of other groups? They are just doing the same as you, so let them be, if you don’t want to be a part of it, don’t get involved and don’t go.

I have had my time as a ‘show whore’, working with 3 groups at once, doing every show i was able to do. Some people are involved in 3, 4, 5 shows in a 3 month period. i realised that in the last 3 years i have been onstage in just 3. Yes i have directed a couple, and fair enough i wrote one, but even that fell prey to the bitch brigade and the stupid side of people. Someone once told me this industry brings out the best in those who do it, but also brings out the worst. There was a time i disagreed. Now i’m more inclined to agree. To the point that when my current rehearsals are over next month, i don’t know if i can be bothered. I like directing, maybe i can do more of that. Maybe i should write more. That was fun. At least our cast cd will be out soon and give me something else to be proud of.

Sorry for being such a misery in this post. Just one of those occasions where it all just beats you. I’m normally quite positive, honest.

However, there may be a follow up along these lines tomorrow. Rumour-mill in overdrive up here at the moment. I will keep you posted.

Thanks for stopping by. Stay classy.