The epitome of I don’t knows

So I haven’t posted in a little while…and quite frankly…I still haven’t got a clue as to what to say. 

I guess I should knock out the easy stuff first. 

Hockey…Haven’t played in awhile. It’s rained for the past 2 weeks, and then the last time they held it I was busy. So tonight, or rather last night, depending on how anal you are about the day based on the time. For me, if I haven’t slept yet…then it’s today (unless I stay up all night, then whatever)  So Hockey…I played tonight. Goaltended. And guess what. The curse continues. No defense…again.  No matter what my team is…I never have defense. That’s been the story for every team I’ve ever been on. They always leave me high and dry. I know that part of that is that they know I’m a damn good goalie, but fun fact….it doesn’t matter how good of a goalie you are…without help from defense…they are going to score. Defense is supposed to put some pressure on the shooter, not give them all the time in the world. Cover the pass, not leave a man right in front of me or on the back door. Clear out the rebound if it comes out, not stand there and watch as the other team gets 2nd and 3rd chances. Offense is supposed to back check, not coast back and watch odd man rushes happen, and when my entire team decides they are all offense, then that leaves me on my own. The team should listen to the goalie…he has the best seat in the house and sees everything…So what he says, and points out…you should listen to. Nope. I can’t count how many times I yelled at my team (communication not rage yelling, even though I was frustrated).  All of them chasing the puck and doing the same thing, all of them screening me and watching the other team skate around with all the time in the world. All of them playing on half of the rink, on one side instead of moving to open space and providing a bunch of options  they lined up along one side of the boards. They continued to try a bunch of fancy bullshit and never manage to get a shot on net. You can’t score if you don’t shoot. Not to mention that that fancy bullshit continued in our defensive zone, playing fucking ping pong in front of their net…causing STUPID ass turn overs and making DUMBASS passes. Turning it over and giving a bunch of easy chances, and easy odd man rushes. So, that was frustrating. I don’t care what anybody says…playing goalie gets stressful. The team relies on you as the last line of defense, and they expect you to make the stop. But there’s only so much a goalie can do, when he is left high and dry by his team. So if I let a goal by, it makes me look like shit, even if it isn’t even remotely my fault. So I look and feel like shit, because it’s like I’m letting down my team…even though it’s really them just leaving me out to dry. And that really sucks, and in between periods I tell them what I see, and then do some skating to refocus, and to keep from going off on them, because when they look at me like I’m letting them down..I get mad. Like I said it doesn’t matter how good of a goalie you are…without help from your team…you got nothing. Some of the greatest goalies ever have had shit seasons because of the people in front of them. Hockey is a team sport, and just because the goalie is basically confined to the defensive end of the rink…doesn’t mean he doesn’t lean on his teammates. So there’s that. I’m dubbing it the Curse of the Kingbino lol 

Alright so this is where things get a little more serious and cray. 

Alright so part 1: B…we don’t really talk much anymore  a few minutes here or there and pretty much only on weekends. So that is whatever. I’m simply just done trying so if she wants to talk it’s on her to message me. 

Now, the real shit. So on one of those dumbass sites, that I have no idea why I bothered signing up for I get messaged by someone. Wouldn’t give their name…and their account name was just nonsense, so they were trying to be anonymous. Didn’t add me, just messaged me. Tried to maintain anonymity. Talked for a little while. Couple days. Immediately my suspicion was sparked. But we talked, and I was pretty damn certain who it was. And I was right. So, we talk, I act like I don’t know who it is. She goes out and celebrates her bday gets drunk and lets it slip who she is. Take a wild guess. Seriously take one. Are you ready for this?

AMBER! Fucking Amber messaged me. 

Flashback: This is the girl that I spent years with. She cheated on me a couple times, but I was always comfortable with her and what not…we had our rough patches and then finally we were working on getting back together and she fucked a dbag that I warned her about and she got preggo. So there’s your little reminder. 

So Lately, I’ve been in a complete state of absolute no emotion, not giving a shit, just whatever. I just haven’t cared at all about much of anything lately. So I just talked to her. When I probably should have just been like fuck off. But I don;t give a shit so I just talked to her anyway.

So, Here I am…talking to the person that get preggers, while we were working on getting back together. I should hate this bitch. Should just be like fuck off, you aren’t worthy of my time. Go fuck yourself. But because for some reason I just dont care about anything, so I just talked.

Come to find out…get this…Her hubby (bc she got married after gettting preggers) is leaving her, because he wants to be free. AKA He wants to go drink himself senseless, and fuck around. And apparently he is trying to just straight up bail on her and the kid without helping support or raise the kid…just trying to flat out bail.  So I’m sitting here…as fucked up as it is…kinda laughing. Like, I called it. I said he was a douchebag that couldn’t be trusted. And boom  AGAIN The King is right. So, I’m partialyl just like hahahaha serves you right bitch. And I probably should have said that and just stopped talkign to her. But I didn’t, cus I’m a good guy..even if I dont give a shit about anything, it’s my default setting. So, she asks if we can hang out one day for a little bit to sort of catch up. So, me not giving a shit about anything, said sure why not. It’s not like anything is going to happen. So we hang out a bit. She talks about all that shit that went on, I don’t say much. She vents about him to me….Can I just say…wtf?!  The guy you basically cheated on and got pregnant from cheating on, and then married the baby daddy…is the guy you choose to vent to…ABOUT THE GUY YOU CHEATED WITH? Yeah…That’s lovely. So I am sitting there listening and being kind, and you know providing some input here and there about how he’s a shit head. And anytime she’d be like, you’re mad…or soemthing like that I told her she was fine. Because while yeah that’s totally fucked up…my mental state is in a place where I just do not give a rat’s ass about anythign. And then she goes all…psychoanaylist on me, and tries to psycho-analyze me. Fucking bitch, don’t psychoanalyze me. I know everything there is to know about me. And your little attempts at understanding me…kinda piss me off. Don’t psychoanalyze me. It pisses me off. Anyway. so we sort of caught up a little bit. Then continued to sort of talk a little bit online and what not. Then the other night. I’m getting ready to go

to sleep, and ring ring ring  my phone starts going off…she’s calling me fucking crying and hysterical. Over him…saying how he’s evil and shit. And venting about the douchebag. Because of course I am the perfect person to do that to. And yeah it pissed me off a bit, I mean I was/am still in that IDGAF state, but it still frustrates me taht she thinks its okay to vent about HIM and their situation…TO ME…of all people. Pissed me off, but you know what I did. I was kind and listened and even fucking consoled her. Talked her down, kinda cheered her up and shit. Because let’s face it…what kind of shit head do you have to be to full on abandon your wife and child, and try to not help support the kid. Even if you aren’t there to help raise the kid…you should at least pay to help support it. So, she called hysterical and I reverted to my default handling other people’s shit mode where I just deal with helping them and their shit. Pretty much emotionless. Like i said IDGAF state.  Just reverted to being that good guy by default. Didn’t think about it or who it was, just did it. So that’s going on. And I have no fucking clue how I’m supposed to or should react. So there’s that. 

ANIMAL CROSSING NEW LEAF IS AWESOME  If you have a 3DS add me.  My friend code is  1032-1403-2143

Steam…Trading Cards…fucking   give me them if you don’t want them XD

King out bitches.