[[99]] EMO.

apparently, i have been very emo lately.

i guess i have been. i don’t know, i’m just tired and frustrated and so bored with this place. i want to move. i want to be done with school. i want to get out of this house where i feel so unwanted. i hate it here, i really do.

i’ve been gaining weight in my tum-tum lately. i look like i’m pregnant. lol. i guess it’s possible that i could be, but i’ve been taking the pill religiously and aunt flo is due in a few days. so i guess we’ll see. it’s been on my mind constantly though, because i feel really strange lately (mentally and physically), and it’s kind of freaking me out a little bit.

things with zachary are wonderful. he is such a supportive and attentive boyfriend. we’re leaving for florida on april 27th, and we’ll be there for ten days. we’re going to be in west palm for a few days, take a trip do disney with his mom, and then hopefully spend a few days in a miami hotel so we can have sex, lol.

school is getting lame. i hate going. i don’t want to do it anymore. i know i need to finish and get my degree, but what then? what the hell can you do with a bachelor’s in creative writing? nothing. but at the same time, that’s what i want. i want to move to texas in two years with zachary and be a housewife. i want to wear housedresses and aprons and make him dinner. i want a big yellow house and a massive piece of land and horses. and i want dafodils in the windowboxes. and i want a big wedding. but i feel like i’m never going to get there. my mom is always holding me back. i just want to get out of here, you know?

anyway, that’s my update. :-