[[91]] i miss sex.

i really honestly do. zachary and i have only had sex once. and i recently had a UTI (which believe me, was NOT fun) and am about to get a visit from aunt flo. so no sex for me. 🙁

valentine’s day is coming up. this is the first year that i have someone to spend it with. i honestly despise the holiday, and i’ve got the t-shirt to prove it. (it’s red and says “valentine’s day stinks!”) but i suppose that i can put up with the teddy bears and i love you’s for a day. i didn’t want to do anything extravagant, so i just got zachary a card that says “love isn’t what makes the world go round. love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” and on the inside i wrote “riding you makes my life worthwhile. haha.” because i’m goofy. i’m also making him a little notebook full of pictures, quotes, lyrics and poems that are meaningful to us. i figure it’s not extravagant but it’s extremely sentimental, so it should suffice.

other than that, not too much is going on. the drama seems to be dying down, and i think i proved my point. i ate some bad food yesterday and was puking at 3:30am. which i really don’t need to do since i’m pretty much super thin already (even though i eat as much as my boyfriend who is not so skinny.) school is going well for the most part. getting up at 6 and not being home until 4 is super exhausting, but i’ll deal.

my relationship is great for the most part. i’m honestly falling for him and it feels good to be with someone who is social but still there for me all the time. things are rough though becuse he’s got a lot of things going on in his life. his mom is moving to florida (we live in michigan), he’s not making enough money at his current job, he needs to get into school but is awaiting acceptance and even if he does get accepting, he’ll have to move into an apartment which means more bills to pay. so yeah, he’s a bit stressed out for the most part, but i do my best to keep him sane.

i am so lucky in my life, really. i have a nice house to live in, parents who support me, a boyfriend who truly wants to make me happy, i go to a great school and study what i love, i have some awesome friends and even though we don’t see each other often it only makes us cherish the time we do have that much more…what more is there really?