Eating Habits

Eating habits are so hard to change. I have been sticking to my new diet fairly well. I even managed to avoid the temptation of leftover cake and a plate of cookies left in the work breakroom Tuesday night. So far, I have lost 5 maybe 6 pounds. I have a strong determination to get to at least 170 but my goal is 160. Last time I felt the determination that I have now, I managed to drop to 168. But, the stress over how Laura might or might not feel about me plus the stresses of divorce still popping up caused me to seek comfort in food and quickly gain the weight back. Those stresses are no longer an issue. Though the frustration of my inability to get a girlfriend or even a date with a woman is ever present. I guess I am using that frustration to fuel my determination to lose weight.

I started this entry because I was craving foods not on my diet. Not so necessarily craving the food but wanting those foods out of habit. I needed to get my mind off of snacking. That is a better term “snacking.” I am not hungry or craving. I just want to snack as that is my typical habit. Of course, I could snack on celery sticks or make unsweetened hot tea or make a sugar-free drink mix. But, my habit is to eat cookies or chips and to drink sugary sodas. Habits, mainly bad habits, are so hard to break.

When I put my thoughts in front of me though, it is easing the discomfort of not giving in to my bad habits. Writing is giving me a bit of encouragement to stay strong. I started this journey at 196/195 and I am currently at 190/189. I have to stay the course and I can make my goal.