Life Update after more than a year!

Well, the last time I posted was March 2019 – then I got hit with the Open Diary $40 per year and thought, shit – I should probably start making use of this again!  🙂

My last post was pretty upsetting and sad.  Feel free to look back (two posts back is when it’s JUICY).  Too long; didn’t read – in October of 2018 I found out my husband had a multiple year “affair” (hardly an affair, the girl gave him blow jobs in his office at work) and I was completely and utterly devastated.  It completely ruined my entire life… or did it?

I hate that this is the case, but for anyone who has gone through a traumatic situation like that — it truly is an awakening.  At least, that’s how I treated it.  I changed as a person.  I stopped lying/fibbing, making bad choices, talking poorly about people, and just decided it was time to make changes.  I realized life was too short and started my MBA (to which I only have 3 classes left!).  I became closer to God and started attending church regularly.

And you’re probably wondering what happened to my husband and I?  Well, as I speak — our month old baby is napping peacefully next to me.  We stayed together for the following reasons:

1. I made him come clean about his misgivings to his FORMER boss and his NEW boss.  Yep.  I made him call his former boss (a big Vice President who is well known nationally) and admit to what he had done.  Made him go to his new boss to do the same.  Why did I do this?  Because I knew in the large yet incredibly small industry that they would find out regardless, and that way, he could control the narrative and share what had ACTUALLY happened.  This actually turned out incredibly well him — both organizations admired him for coming clean, and he was able to get help.  He still keeps in touch with the former VP of his organization, and is incredbly well respected for his new organization.
2. He started counseling and intense therapy to deal with his issues.  Just as an FYI, I thought my husband was SUPERMAN.   Turns out, he was only pretending, and was actually crumbling inside every day.  News flash!  Those who cheat on their doting, loving spouses are not well in the head.  Therefore; they need help.

My husband’s actions have proven to me he is the husband he always wanted to be.  A lot of people probably disagree with me staying with him, but if you knew the lengths he has gone to get healthy, become a better person and husband, then you’d understand and support my decision!  Or maybe not.  But overall — our marriage is better; stronger than ever, we became parents, and are incredibly happy.  It’s almost as though we created a whole new relationship.  Our old marriage, is and was DEAD.

Anywho – just a quick entry while baby sleeps!  Hope you all are staying well in these trying times.

Much love,

~Elle.