07/01/2011

Don’t really know where to begin…am at such a weird spot right now.

I hate seeing my life pass me by as I’m staring out the passenger window.  Isn’t it funny how we sit and wait for our lives to get started AFTER we:  Get out of debt, lose weight, get a better job, etc.

Ugh.  So sick of doing that.

I have the chance to live a pretty cool life right now.  I’m only 24, and am letting potential slip through the cracks day in and day out.  Boy, if I had a dime for EVERY time I said that.

Scattered thoughts.

I seriously am in desperate need to lose 20 pounds.  Asap.  I haven’t been to the gym in like, two weeks.  Being busy, working a lot, NO excuse.  I need to make time to work out.  Not only that, but my eating habits are such dog shit!  What is wrong with me!  I have to get it together.

Was going to help coach volleyball.  On a drinking binge, fucking missed my first day of work so basically cannot do it anymore.  I am SO fucking stupid.  Ugh.  Now I have to find a way to talk to them and send all of my shit back!  HATE when I drink and am irresponsible.  

Also had an interview with a staffing agency about a job.  MISSED THAT TOO thanks to a drunken night out.  

Ugh.  Aside from getting chubby, not having any money, having NO pride in myself…I could potentially have an AWESOME life!  Seriously!

Tomorrow I have the day off.  Goal is to get organized!  Life together!  Get another job!  Save money–LIVE BETTER!  

Did I really just throw in the Wal-Mart catch phrase?  FML.

Don’t feel like writing.

Much love,

-Elle.