drink a lot … love a little

i really wished my title was … love a lot .. drink a little

its always a scary but exciting feeling when you give in to all your insecurities and put your trust in someone else, that you open up and let them see behind the mask, leaving you raw, naked and vulnerable to rejection … i didnt realise how gut wrenchingly sickening it would feel to do that to myself … to take off the mask and put my trust in myself … to open myself up to be vulnerable without the self protection that i enforce apon myself.

As they say, we are always our worst critics … and i, never used to give myself higher than a 1 star review

But now … you know what .. im liking this feeling, although it was scary to get to this point .. i like what i see .. i like what i feel, and at times i want to scream and shout out my frustrations of my unreturned affections … at least feeling that way is making me feel alive… remind me of that next time i bitch and moan!