Lost Love

How can I engage with you
How can I love you again.
If I am to be the pariah
Hated to the end
If you don’t see how I love you
And don’t see how I care
What promise of forgiveness
Is mine in life to hope for
I held you as a baby
And taught you as a child
But I was not always as patient
I did not always have the time.
Children are demanding
Selfish, so am I!
So many years have past now
In old age you put me through hell.
How long will be my kindness
My forgiving eclectic mind
Till at last on my death bed
A wretched soul you find
Will you still carry on your hatred
As they bury my body below
Or will you see the ray of sunshine
Perhaps from a god above.