Wow

 I really miss writing here on a regular basis.  It’s just too much with Anna being so needy.  If I get five or ten minutes without holding her, there are about a million other things I have to get done. I really should be doing other things right now too.  But I had to pay some money on my credit cards.  They’ve been behind for months now.  I just got my deposit back from moving out of the apartment so I paid them down as much as I could.

Anna is getting better. She had another period of not gaining weight but then I increased her bottles and she gained 7oz in a week.  She still gets strictly breast milk either from my breasts or from donated milk supplies.  I have two regular donors and then a few other people donate when they have time.  It’s a lot of work to pump so I am just thankful for the people who do it for me.  

No luck on the job search as of right now.  I have applied to at least 15 jobs or more in the last three months and haven’t gotten so much as a single call back.  I can’t make people hire me so here I sit and wait for them to call.  

I am doing okay personally. I’m pretty depressed about my situation but I’m getting better. I am going to get my hair cut today finally.  I have also decided to start volunteering an hour per week in K’s classroom. I will be listening to kids practice reading and  helping some with math review.  H’s grandma is going to keep Anna for me.  Out of everyone who watches her for us, Grandma is about the only one who can get her calm and happy.  I feel bad for my parents because Anna just doesn’t respond to them.  I think their house is too loud.  

With that, my baby beckons.  

~Tav