Hundred-Twenty-Six: Can’t Be Jealous

Entry For NOJOMO #6

Love Changes You

Told From Kaden’s POV

I hope Kayleen didn’t think I was oblivious to what she was doing. Weather she was ready or not for me to know, I do. This girl has a serious problem with the way she is coping with things. I don’t even know her that way and it’s so obvious. I am not sure what to do. I don’t even know why I care yet. Maybe I don’t. Maybe I just need the distraction. I am too far in this thing now to back down. I can’t just abandon her.

In the back of my mind, there is Tanya. For some reason I care for her but I think it’s because I see a wounded bird (figuratively of course. Her veela-bird-thingy is fine). Whenever she and I went on the journey of running from the death earth prophecy, it was very clear the best thing for her was let her go. I could her passion for me burn in her eyes. It would’ve been so easy to tell her I love her, and in a sense, I do but she doesn’t need the life of being on the run all the time. She also doesn’t deserve the isolation I can succumb to. The personality doesn’t fit.

Zeke doesn’t even need to be with her. He is subjecting her to the same life I tried to get her away from. Maybe something between them is meant to be but if we ever have to run away again, I know she’ll relapse. Poor Zeke doesn’t even know about her and Harry. She was always honest with me about it but he doesn’t know. Should I tell him?

So many internal conflicts.

Told From Ordinary POV

The Holiday Spirit was beginning to show around Hogwarts. The giant tree was being decorated and put up nicely. The professors seemed to be having a good time doing it. I am always stuck here around Holidays. I have no home to go back to. Alana usually goes to the Malfoy Manor, and I am here with a few random wizards who are in the same boat as me. Usually, Harry and I spend a quiet evening together but this year, which would be out of the question.

“It gets cold earlier every year.” I said huddling my arms against my body. Zeke and Kaden both laughed as if it were an inside joke. Suddenly, Kaden blows out icy cold breath as I got it. “Oh…you’re always cold…” I trailed off. “So I was wondering what you guys did for the Holiday? Here at Hogwarts, the students who have a home to go to goes and the ones who can’t…stays here.”

Zeke and Kaden looked at each other with confusion. “We’re travelers but I guess we’ll spend our time here on campus.” Kaden replied. “I can’t hangout too long. I made plans with Kayleen. I’m sure you two love birds want some alone time anyhow.”

I glared at Kaden but nothing would come out of my mouth. How could I tell him I wasn’t enjoying this? I needed to have this talk with him but I couldn’t. I had no stance. I had no argument.

“Okay,” I shrugged. I took Zeke’s hand as we walked away. “Their friendship is happening so fast,” I complained.

“He needs someone in his life though. I was worried about him. He’s so hostile all the time and has no idea how to loosen up. It seems she doesn’t either so maybe they’ll be good for one another.” Zeke replied. I sighed heavily trying to hold in my envy. “You seem bothered….I mean I’ve been wanting to talk to you about this for awihle. I brought it up once but….between you and Kaden….”

“Don’t worry. Nothing ever happened between us….I mean I could’ve easily seduced him. I really could’ve but I fell for you instead.” I was lying to Zeke and myself. I couldn’t seduce him. Zeke did attract me though. I am not settling for him. “I just….you’re the one for me, okay?” I realized how insecure Zeke was. Am I not untrustworthy? Should I tell him about Harry and start a clean slate?