school is back

School, ahh school it is wonderful, my time away, my time to be the me I like to be. The me who can use the brain God gave me. You know being a mom is awesome, and wonderfully hard, but you don’t have to use your brain for complex thought, you merely survive when you have little babies. WIth school despite the chaos I feel more balanced.

Travis is unbareable to me right now, He is a monster trapped by the demons of his own creation. It is to much for me right now. He is on the battle creek waiting list but it is never ending. There may be hope of him going to Minnesota though for a different program?

In gender pscyh it creates anxiety in me. You know I have been entrusted with the souls of two young men, and I need to make them men of charater, but being a male is hard. Defining who you are wihtout the world crushing you can be hard. Ughh… Having a girl seems easier. But, I am sure I will figure it out. I am aware of it. I know some things for certain,, I will not tell my boys to be a man, or to grow up. I will not hurl insults at them that suggest they are not manly enough. 

Also, in regards to having homo/bisexual children, I have no problems with that, there are worse things than having a child who is different for some reason, whats worse is raising a child who thinks it is okay to be mean to a child who is different. It goes the same for everything I suppose. I want to raise loving accepting children who don’t see differences as good or bad, but merely different and there is nothing wrong with it. I mean you can chose a pen or a pencil but they both write, and they both can do great things, so does it mater?

I should be applying to grad school in the next few weeks, I am excited, not nervous so much. I mean it can’t be that bad can it?

I think I should be going to bed, I am super tired.

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