Doctor

You want to hear some good news? My b/p this morning was normalish. 

The other news? 

Well I went to the doctor, and she is convicned that I have fibromyalgia. I have all the symptoms of it. I have had it for a while. It just took some time for me to admit it. There is little we are going to be doing for it right now. I just tollerate it and hope it doesn’t get worse 

Anyways, it is something. At least it means I am not entirely crazy right? I mean I always have a headache, I always ache. 

The second thing is she said this spot on my stomach is not a strechmark.

It hurts and burns, I don’t know if you can tell from the picture, but it is like a crater in my skin and it is purplsih/black underneath it. It burns actually. It is the spot that hurt after I had Sabastian, but the crater wasn’t there, it is the spot that hurt a few years ago when they said I had the fat twiasted upon itself. 

I am supposed to see a dermotolgist, they wanted me to come in tomorrow, but obvioulsy I will be in Indy for Travis. The next appointment is over a month away. WHich I took, but they want me in sooner. Sigh. 

Anyways, I need to find someone who specializes in birth trauma, and soon. I am struggling more than I can audibly admit too. It isn’t like depression it is like panic. 

Tongiht I am supposed to have my caregiver support group but I think I will miss it because of Travis. I am burning out taking care of him. In fact I down right resent his inability to just pull himself together, I have so many needs that are unfufilled ahd he doens’t even know I have them. 

Tomorrow is Indy, at least is a change of scenery. 

I had a nice mothers day and I have Sirris’ well baby, but he is calling my name…. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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