1 month

 Today I am offically 1 month away from the safe zone to have this baby. I am more freaking out than relieved. I have had both other babies early. I have no reason to beleive this baby will go over by a week or 2. Too look at me you would think no. 

Today has been a horrible one, one that has left me on the verge of tears most of the day. 

I don’t even have the energy to go into it. Just things are not working out in any good way, and I have no idea where everything will settle. 

My most imediate need is reliable childcare. From there everything else will fall into place. 

I do have to say, one thing about my day. Just because I am young doesn’t mean I have no life experience, or understanding. Don’t assume that because I look younger than you that I don’t get it. I understand more than you think. I also am craving more firneds who get it. Get what it is like to have a ptsd husband, and special needs kiddos, and are there to support me. 

I am having one of those days where I realize even though I have it together on the outside most of the time. I am faking it. I fake it so well I forget how much I do. 

Ahhhh….. So much more I could expand on, but dont have time too. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 babyfruit ticker

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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January 14, 2013

🙁 hope you have a better day tomorrow. *hugs*

People think that about me, sometimes.. that I don’t have any life experience. They don’t realize all of the things I’ve been through. Not just medically, but in relationships. I babysat 40+ hours a week (during the school year) when I was 11 (for several years) to help support my family. I grew up fast. I wish that I could snap my fingers and make people understand–for you and for me. And I wish

there was a formula to follow to find friends who do understand. There aren’t many who can understand–your situation. My situation. They aren’t “the norm”. You always have us here at OD. We may not have been through the same things, but we’re here to listen and support you. 🙂

January 18, 2013

Wow. powerful words. I look a lot younger than i am too- and its hard to find people who take you seriously. I dont have many friends with kids who live closeby. I didnt know your husband had ptsd? military? guess i missed that part. write more about your husband!