Alive and breathing

Just before I woke this morning, in a dream I was at a baseball game. For some reason I was standing next to Robert Duvall and had my arm around him like we were long lost pals. We weren’t really  watching the game because, in a box across from us Tom Hanks was directing a movie. He was behind glass and I could see he was talking vehemently to the actors in the scene. Then he turned the camera towards the crowd and for a minute I thought I might be in a movie standing next to Robert Duvall. Robert said he had to go and he stepped into the aisle and started down the steps. I called to him "Can I just say how much I have enjoyed your work?" He nodded a thanks.

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Yesterday, S and I spent many hours at the hospital with other family members while my younger brother had back surgery. He has been in tremendous pain for a few weeks now with his doctors seemingly ringing their hands saying it could be this or it could be that. This culminated in a trip to the Emergency Room. In the end, it seems, a tumor on his spine seemed to have gone unnoticed. The back surgery was meant to stabilize his spine in advance of treatment for the tumor. My brother, who hasn’t slept well in weeks, now under the influence of pain meds, seemed almost giddy at times before the surgery. But more than once he blinked back tears at his bewildering circumstances.

The surgery lasted almost six hours and the person at the desk in the waiting room told us V had been moved to the recovery room. Afterwards, we expected the surgeon to come out and tell us how things had gone. But he never came out. We kept going up to the desk and asking when someone would come down to talk to us. This lasted about two hours and was very frustrating. Eventually, the desk person came and said that everything had gone well but that the doctor had left the hospital!

My youngest sister immediately asked who we would complain to and I found the doctor’s email and sent him a message asking him when he might update us. The desk person, who was very apologetic, arranged to have two of our party taken to the recovery room so we sent my mom and youngest sister. Within 30 minutes, the rest of us were invited back. The recovery room nurse told us this was not the normal protocol but I think they felt bad about the doctor leaving without saying anything. V seemed giddy again and was in rare form chatting up the nurses and talking with all of us. It was such a relief to see him.

When someone you love has surgery, you worry. Okay, I worry. When we knew surgery had ended, all we wanted to know is that he was okay, we needed the information and it was maddening that the doctor didn’t come find us. But that all dissipated once we were in the recovery room and could see V for ourselves, alive and breathing.