The Complete Guide

this guide of course assumes that you haven't already talked to your kids about this subject. if that assumption is wrong, please feel free to forget everything you're about to read.

note: 'remain calm' should not be confused with 'don't be nervous' as some nervousness is unavoidable given the nature of the subject, the fragility of the immature ego, and the likelihood that your child will end up resenting some element of your presentation for the rest of his or her life.

remember: all controversies should be properly anesthetized before nipping!

note: 'relax!' should not be confused with 'don't worry!' as a complete lack of worry correlates rather strongly with being dead.

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Now I have to go look up electronarcosis.