How to Say Goodbye

It snowed another 2 feet at the cabin–almost 15 feet now of compacted snow. The satillite is on a 15 ft pole and it’s almost covered…(!) and it’s not over yet the weatherman just predicted another 2 feet of snow. I’m sitting here wondering how in the heck are we going to move are belongings up to our cabin–Couches, chairs, boxes and boxes and boxes of our stuff. I can just picture hubby and I trying to move these heavy objects on snoeshoes. GLOBAL WARMING MY ASS!

Exhibit A

OMG! I will need to add this to my worry list. Speaking of worry list, I need to really start writing my worries to help me keep focus.

My Worry List

*Moving our stuff in deep deep snow

*finding a job that will pay me at least $25.00 hr

*Husband finding any type of a job–It’s hard for him to find a job

*What about my cat mittens? will she like the snow. Will she fall into a crevice of snow and never return? Will she ran away?

*If I do find a good paying job, will I be able to drive up and down the mountain pass in bad weather.

*How will I wash my clothes and look presentable at work?

*Will we have enough firewood for me to keep warm.

*Will I get lonely, being so far away from my family

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I haven’t started packing up anything yet. I really need to get up and just do it–but I can’t I’m not ready yet. Need to tell my mind to just do it but I can’t not yet.

I did buy some card board boxes and a purple hard plastic box at home depot though, so that’s a start.

I have came to realize that it is indeed time to leave my present job, a job that I have worked at for the last 5 years. Things aren’t going so well out work when you have a Health Service Director that likes to micro manage everybody. She really has mastered the art–I just love how she delegates everyone to do HER work. I feel bad for the activity director, she has been delegated to type health related incident reports onto the computer. The maintenance lady now has to be on call on the weekends to handle health and staffing matters. It’s time for me to go. I hear the clock ticking I can almost smell change.

Thinking about working for the state again. Echo Glen is just 18 miles from the cabin. It’s a teenagers lock up facility. Perhaps this will be a new challenge for me. I have worked with trouble teens before and really liked it. Many years ago, I helped out with a teen center in Tacoma. Most of these teens were homeless and runaways.

Something for me to chew on for a while

But.

I will miss Rose–I love this little 90 year old lady. She really rocks my world. She is on hospice. I’m becoming very attached-how do I learn to be de-attached? She really does pull my heart and soul strings. She is ready to die, and tells me so each and every day. She is refusing to take some of her VIP meds. She wants to die. After lunch,I hang with her. help her get into her recliner chair. I ‘m proud to say I have master the art of taking care of her, I know she likes to nestle into her recliner after lunch, she likes two blankets folded in half and placed on her, and not forgetting to cover up her feet. She likes to have her O2 at 2 liters, Gatorade the blue kind next to her on her recliner side table, blinds turned open just so. I place my ipod into my little new ipod gizzmo and hit the play list of her choice. Today it was Doris Day. Tomorrow, it will be the best of Sinatra. Her and I have the same choice in music=OLD SCHOO==Way back in time–20’s 30’s and 40’s. Lucky for her I have thousands of songs from this era of time. She speaks her mind and teaches me beyond measure. I lean in and listen closely. Words of Wisdom to live by. I have treasured our times together. Albiet, I just haven’t figured out how to say Goodbye!!!

I will leave you on a brighter and sunnier picture of a blissful day