I’m Sooo Stupid!!!……

So there’s this guy that I’ve been friends with for the past 6 years now and at one point I really liked him. Then I kind of just started liking him as a friend and that’s it but he really liked me. My whole family and all my friends said that we’d make a cute couple, but I didn’t date him. Well later on I did start to like him again, but he was over me and was liking other girls so I never said anything to him about it. So I’ve held it in for  like the past year and a half and it really inhales vigorously. I can’t just talk to him about it though because he just recently moved to another state that’s like well only two states away, but that’s still far away from here. I wanted to tell him, but I just didn’t know how to and now it’s too late. I can’t believe I let such a great guy get away from me. I don’t regret having my daughter at all and if I would have dated him then, then she probably wouldn’t be here, but I still wish I would have told him at some point. I guess I actually kind of liked him the whole time we’ve been friends, but he’s the best friend I’ve ever had and I didn’t want to lose him. I kept telling myself that I only liked him as a friend because what if we did go out and then something happened and we broke up? Would we still be friends? I didn’t want to take that risk so I supressed my true feelings for him. Now he’s gone and I feel so hurt and crappy about it and I don’t know what to do. Ok I think I’m done venting for right now.