Hey i kinda miss you

Yes, this is still going to be me nagging about my heart ache so if you don’t want to read any of that don’t go on. We finally started talking a little, I thought I already could handle him talking to me like normal friends, but I feel that it still hurts quite a lot for me. Especially when he tells me he said to a mutual friend of ours that he should ask me out to go to the movies, that’s really nice of him -_- why would he want that so badly? He keeps pushing me to go with that friend but i don’t want to. And it has very little to do with him (okay maybe i’m lying on this one), I just don’t fucking want anyone right now (that’s not a lie) why is that so hard to understand? And I don’t know I just start to miss it when we talk and it’s just not good for me. It still stings a lot, I’m still hurted, I still have feelings for him. Even after everything that pretentious little fuck did, I still like him. I know I shouldn’t say that, that doesn’t help me with moving on at all, but it’s the truth, and I’m only being honest with myself. I don’t know if I’ll ever lose all my feelings for him, I honestly don’t think I will. He will probably always have some special place in my heart even if I wish he didn’t. Believe me, I would love to be fully over him, to not care anymore and concentrate on my own life, it’s just that that’s not the case. But I’m not giving up, just not yet. I want to be over him, that’s my long-term goal right now.