Firsts and Friends

After 5 years (has it really been that long) of being an intimate part or each other’s lives we met. My friend, K Pasa, here for business and me, the new boss lady, drowning in a sea of tasks and overdue projects. Somehow we stole the time to meet and explore each other as only new old friends can. I was thrilled to realize that this was the flesh and blood, body and soul behind the voice and the words that I have come to know.

With no clear idea of where to eat we drove and chatted until we found an enormous fish protruding into the Buckhead preppie skyline. Enormous is an understatement. As we waited for the valet to come get the car we actually discussed the mechanics of raising such a monument. What a claim to fame to be able to say that you were the one responsible for this giant fish erection. Inside, there was an hour and 20 minute wait. We were starving. I have no idea why (perhaps my friends raw male testosterone levels overpowering the hostess?) but suddenly there was a table available for us with no wait. The bus boy began doing drive-bys. On the first trip we got water, the next trip brought butter and finally came the bread. Finally the perkiest little waitress you’d ever wish to meet appeared – a walking, talking encyclopedia of recommendations for food, wine, and desserts. The total package of waitresses. We enjoyed the yummiest fish dinner I’ve ever had and were on our way in less than the hour and 20 minutes that it should have taken us to just get seated.

Because I am rather lacking in knowledge of what there is to do in mid-town Atlanta (and thus did not earn any Martha Stewart hostess points) we headed back to his hotel for a longer chat seated in the lobby. Someone was smoking a cigar and I thought of my dad. We talked about work, about dreams, about plans, about love. He’s a writer and I’m a traveler, at least in our no-holds-barred-anything-is-possible dreams. We’re both hopeless eternal students, earning college degrees without end. He is looking for a love that is “normal” to complete his family and complete him in his roles as father, lover and husband. I am looking for a companion that is anything but “normal” who will accept me and my family as is. Looks like we’ll bothe be looking for a while! We planned our respective futures as millionaires and plotted the sort of sweet revenge on spiteful ex-spouses that could only be pulled off with that sort of money. I left for home after offering to be available again should he be able to steal more time before he left. I drove home smiling, glad we met and feeling a bit incomplete – as if there must be more to come now that we were over the initial tension of two familiar strangers.

Saturday I had to work…Did I say I wanted to be the Boss Lady? I got up and went to work as SW Raw – no make-up, wet hair, wearing a 10 year old sweatshirt. Late in the afternoon my phone rang. I was delighted to find that my friend had stolen a bit more time by ducking out of his meeting (if his boss is reading this – it wasn’t his fault – I physically threatened him and said I had a gun…). We went to play tourist. Did I mention that I have never actually taken the time to figure out what’s what in Atlanta? We went to a hands-on science museum. It was near closing time and we got a bargain rate. Good thing. I am sad to report that this museum does not reflect a picture of Atlanta as a savvy and technologically advanced city. But the company was good – and there is something to be said for being able to laugh at computers that don’t compute and exhibits that don’t exhibit. We did have a bit of excitement in the museum store when we found a computer game called CyberMama. Whoo-Hoo! Unfortunately, it turned out not to be about a red-hot cyber momma in leather who rules the over-18-only-please chat rooms.

Next we were off to check out a combination book store/coffee house we had seen earlier. As we entered it became quite clear that my friend’s earlier assessment of this place as having a mostly gay clientele was correct. We wandered around looking at the books. I found one titled “How to Make Friends, Kick Ass & Influence People. He found one about finding love. Yep – we were holding true to our usual patterns. The place was unique, but rather crowded and we set off in search of a roomier place. We found a Barnes & Noble, got some coffee & tea and sat down to talk some more.

Conversation? Well how about Jim Brickman music and Jethro Tull, breadmakers, veggie steamers, smells and writing careers? How about folks who bend stereotypes – guys who like to cook and are sensitive (he’ll actually watch chick flicks) versus outwardly tough cynical women with (so I’ve been told) laughter that can be heard & recognized from far, far away (and I HATE chick flicks!)? Hey! Have you ever seen a guy who will actually ask a clerk for assistance in finding a book? Amazing. Makes me wonder if he’d stop and ask for directions….. Naw…., probly not!

By this time I was feeling very at ease with my friend. Come on – he never even flinched at the vision of SW raw and ungroomed! What a guy! But it was time for him to return for a last round of meetings and my daughter was awaiting her chariot to the skating rink. I returned him to his hotel and we parted with a hug, a smile……and a vow to not wait another 5 years. Friends are so cool and this friend is THE coolest!